Friday, September 30, 2005

Nazi Doctors, Stakes, Rugby and You:

Thought for the Day:
A flatterer is a friend who is your inferior, or pretends to be so.

the f word
(…and a Happy Friday to you as well)

Day Two of the “JQP’s First Annual Viewers Choice Awards
for “Tattoo of the Year”

Send your submissions to, see the posting on 9/29/05 for rules and details, need not be present to win, void where prohibited by law.

The Day Ahead:
Both my loving wife and I are off to the metropolis of Indianapolis today for an appointment with the “Josef Mengele of Knee Surgeons”, yes dear reader its drain the knee day, I am tired of walking around with one knee the size of a small watermelon.

(Moustache hairs complementary with every meal)

I find the whole process most disturbing, they only give you a local, then they take a fucking huge needle and shove it around inside your knee and lastly it fucking hurts like a little bitch. Thus after that I am going to treat myself to a Blood Mary or two at my favorite steak house in the world, St. Elmo’s ( Nothing soothes the savage soul like a steak and a fresh made cocktail.

About 8 years ago I was very, very, sick and had to go through a very demanding medical treatment, to this day I believe that there were only two things that saved me, one being the love of a good woman (props to Mrs. JQP) and second the search for the perfect Bloody Mary.

I love Bloody Mary’s it’s the only drink that is truly an art form for the bartender, have you ever see one’s eye’s light up when you perch on the bar stool and say “I hear you have the best Bloody Mary’s around” then they go into detail about how theirs is both different than all the rest and the best.

Dear reader, I have had Bloody Mary’s from coast to coast, and St. Elmo’s is by far the best. For starters they say when you order them that it will take a little bit. This is because they make it all fresh, per drink. Yes, fresh, they juice tomatoes, grind horseradish etc. for each drinks, no pre-mix here. You can almost feel the heart beat of the veggies when you drink it. Damn brothers and sisters, it’s good… the second best is found at Scotty’s Beach Bar in Surfside Beach, South by-God Carolina, and you can tell ‘em JQP sent you.

Last Night:
The burden of starting a tradition fell heavily upon my shoulders last night; thus this brief re-cap over the events and people who make up the No-Love-Thursday Social Club. I got drunk and loud, big news flash there…Flavia Puff, called the meeting to order, in attendance over the course of the evening, were M. Chamberlain, Newspaper Man, Johnny Vanilla (who proudly told everyone he just bought a Pomeranian for 1000 bills, shit man, I love my wife, but a grand for a fuzz-ball dog). Mark-O the giant Irishman, and sweet and currently non-fertile Mrs. JQP, Double N, and the Biter Red Headed Lady (small attendance, but Pastor Bob and his contingent of malcontents are currently boycotting in protest of Flavia Puffs rein as leader.

After a brief meeting we dashed off to the Macedonian Road House for a meal of melted Velveeta and Pickled farm produce. My bride poured me into bed around 10:00. Shots are like JQP crack… Note to self, no more than 20 shots on a school night, yes, dear reader I am looking and feeling my best today.

Spanking of the Week:
bad girls
Goes to Little Tommy the bicycle seat sniffer and bugger eater:
Tom Delay
Dusty turned me on to his long list of transgressions, better written and typed than I could ever hope to produce for you here:

This Weekend:
I have my college homecoming, some of you might remember last year when I played in the homecoming alumni vs. the students Rugby game. I lasted 1 minute and 48 seconds before I was knocked unconscious and transported via EMS to a local hospital, due to head trauma. Which I am told, can and often does happen when a 280 pound man stands on your head for any length of time. I happen to think that this presents a fantastic opportunity to try out my new knee, you know lets see what this Texan can do, however my sweet and loving wife said that if I play I am A) fucking nuts and B) taking care of myself during what promises to be a long and painful convalescence.

She however softened her view when I informed her that the double indemnity clause on my life insurance would be in effect. So, if beaten with they dumb-ass stick, I might play a game or two, in a vain effort to recapture a little bit of my misspent youth.

Your Drinks of the Week:
tray guy

JQP’s “Rich Man’s Sweat” Drink Recipe

Drink Ingredients:
1 tsp. Sweet Vermouth
Orange Juice
1 1/2 oz. Gin
1 Lemon Twist
1 1/2 oz. Anejo Rum
1 oz.. Triple Sec
Fill with Orange Juice

In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine all of the ingredients. Shake well. Strain into a Pint Glass.

The Mexican Stalker Drink Recipe
(Since I have a taste for all things Latin)

Drink Ingredients:
1/2 oz. Lime Juice
1/2 oz. Triple Sec
3 oz. Jose Cuervo Tequila
1/2 oz. Licor 43
1/2 oz. White Rum

Today’s Bill:
A wretched soul, bruised with adversity,
We bid be quiet when we hear it cry;
But were we burdened with like weight of pain,
As much or more we should ourselves complain.
William Shakespeare

Quote of the Day:
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
Sir Winston Churchill

Shake. Strain into chilled martini glass. Garnish with lime wedge.

I remain, much like an uncomfortable itch:

JQP esq.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

On No-Love-Thursday and other matters of the Heart:

Thought for the Day:
An angry man is again angry with himself when he returns to reason.
Publilius Syrus (~100 BC)

Once more into the breach:
Since it’s No-Love-Thursday, and my flower thinks she might now have to work late, the cosmic pull is starting to dictate my behavior (that and the three phone calls and 7 e-mails and in case your asking, yes I was this popular in Jr. High).

There is at this early hour, a 50/50 chance of drinking after work in the company of my merry band of jesters and intellectuals. Fear not good reader, I as the dutiful farmer, still plan to deeply till the fertile soil of the sweet and erotic Mrs. JQP, planting firmly my seed, awaiting the spring and a bountiful harvest (have you ever seen the movie “Boy’s from Brazil”?)


… dig it… I am the Johnny Appleseed of Love-Making. I like that.

On a side note:
She said she can’t wait for me to see her new sex toys:
white trash barbe

JQP’s First Annual Viewers Choice Awards
for “Tattoo of the Year”:
my new girlfriend
(This example is of my last girlfriend and yes I still often think of her, also it’s the work of that Master of the Ink, Dobbs himself)

Thats right, you read it here, today marks the kick off of “Tattoo of the Year” The rules are simple, there are two categories one is yours (as in tattoo’s you have on your body) and second is for “found art” and I will let you define that anyway you want.

Send them to my super secret e-mail address at I will post them and then you the reader get to vote, like Chicago politics, vote early vote often. If you are thinking about entering, please remember if you’re a girl skin sells, if you’re a guy it’s just fucking gross.

This contest will be over when I say it is and most likely the results will be posted on a day when I am busy or hung-over or perhaps both. Come on, what are you chicken?

On Last Night:
I was a good boy, I was smart and I kept the Boy Scout Code. I called Pete the Fire Man and Pastor Bob and told them that I wasn’t feeling well and went home. Once home I cooked a chicken (marinating in JQP’s Secret Capt. Morgan’s & Coffee Hot Pepper Sauce for 24 hours, available at fine retailers near you), took a hit of Nyquil, two pain pills and tripped to the light fantastic. However at about 10 I awoke from a dream about little footed Asian women dancing on my full bladder, thus I found myself craving Chinese food, so off I dashed in my pj’s to a downtown take-out joint.

Now I don’t know about you but I hate going to a Chinese place when they are restocking, there were all these food stuffs of questionable freshness sitting in boxes all over the place, while a chap wearing a MP3 player was singing along to the latest hits of Outer Mongolia, mopping around the boxes and live chickens, with water the color and consistency of putty.

fast food

Questionable health risk yes, but then again I have never once seen anyone clean a wok in a Chinese place, plus having been both a single man and a world traveler, I have a somewhat looser standard when it comes to food prep cleanliness.

Anyway, I got my Dim Sum, dashed home and ate it in front of the TV, throwing the unidentifiable parts to the hounds (the sweet and loving Mrs. JQP was on the road, so the rules of the house change to reflect this new found freedom for all in the kingdom). I happened onto the Discovery Health Channel, friends, this is not something to watch while eating Dim Sum from a tacky Chinese place named "Happy Time Dragon Food and Take Away".

On DHC they we showing some poor woman who started having seizures about two years after visiting Mexico, turns out she ate an undercooked pork burrito, and got worms in her brain, which they said isn’t that big a deal until they die and form abscesses, Bon fucking Appetite. Lesson learned, stick to ESPN 2 or the History Channel.

Home Sweet Home:
I have had a few readers ask about the manor house, I posted a visual representation of it a year or so ago, so I would like to take the time to once again post it so that you the reader can form a mental image of our little castle.
(This was taken during Mrs. JQP’s days as a long haul truck driver, the Bass Boat is parked around back next to my Gold 1976 Tans Am).

Here is a shot of the interior I took this morning, Our home was recently featured on the hit cable show “While you were Out”, however since our neighbors cook meth in their garden shed we were a bit less than enthusiastic about their interior designing skills, I for one don’t care for the peach-fuzz color of paint on the dinning room walls shown here.
My dinning room
(I know it’s a cheap shot, but I liked it)

Today’s Bill:
What a piece of work is a man! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! William Shakespeare, "Hamlet", Act 2 scene 2

Quote of the day:
The men who create power make an indispensable contribution to the Nation’s greatness, but the men who question power make a contribution just as indispensable, especially when that questioning is disinterested, for they determine whether we use power or power uses us. John F. Kennedy, Amherst College, Oct 26, 1963

I remain much like the Butterfly Tattoo on the saggy breast of Mother Nature:

JQP esq.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Future Sex, Begging for Cash, and Tacky Pick-up Lines:

Thought for the Day:
Beware of dissipating your powers; strive constantly to concentrate them. Genius thinks it can do whatever it sees others doing, but is sure to repent of every ill-judged outlay.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)

On Today:
real bum
I have about a 100,000.00 that I need to come-up with before Jan. so, I am grant writing my ass off and out begging. It really hurts when there is a disaster, all the funders give money (has they should) to those folks and the well runs dry. It makes it hard for those of us in the public service, because we are the budget cuts you hear about. So, as a result there isn’t a lot of witty discourse for your purview today. I have to keep my head in the game.

Today’s Public Service Announcement:
no hoe

On Tonight:
I am going to have drinks and dinner with Pastor Bob and Pete the Fireman, Pete asked me to mention that he is single, so if any of you ladies would like the hook up drop me a line.

Why is Pete still single, you might ask? Well, I think its all in the presentation, he’s a hell of a good guy, rugged, and straight forward and has about 10 medals for heroism, but when he is around women he resorts of pick-up lines that should have been retired with the polyester. His current favorite is “Hey Baby, I am a fireman, I find ‘em hot and leave them wet, want a come back to my pad and help me with some hose?”. This shit cracks me up, it’s true.

Last Night:
I went out with my mentor (The Monsignor) for food, drinks and spiritual guidance. It was an evening of fast paced banter. However the food left something to be desired. I against my better judgment ordered the Norwegian Pizza, yes the Norwegian Pizza. Right now I know you’re asking yourself what is on a Norwegian Pizza. Well dear reader, it’s a hot pizza crust loaded with cold foods, such as capers, smoked salmon, red onions, green olives, and cream cheese. Folks a winner it was not. But Hell, it might have been the best thing ever, you never know unless you try.

About half way through or dinner we were joined by the sweet and loving Mrs. JQP, who has is her custom rolled in like a tornado through a trailer court. We enjoyed vespers and a few more drinks, while talking about the issues of the day, and after my flower left (there was something on Animal Planet she didn’t want to miss), about our relationships. You see The Monsignor is gay.

He is Out and Proud gay, and a hell of a good friend of mine. If you know any gay people you know that thier relationships are just as fucked up as rest of us, but its also fun to get the view from the other side of the fence. When the subject of gay marriage comes up I always think of him and his partner, I think that gay people should have the same rights as the rest of us, the joys of going through a divorce and getting dragged into court. Hell, those folks pay the same taxes I do. We both got a chuckle about the churches band on Gay Priests, more on that some other time.

Dear reader, I plan not to be in attendance at No-Love-Thursday, this week. Yes, I know it’s a shocker.
what a party
The countless other members will have to pick up the banner and charge on without me. The reasons for this decision are many and valid, chiefly they include the expected egg drop that my wife hopes to be experiencing.
trucker ass
At her insistence I am to be home for a modeling of her latest purchases from Victoria’s Secret, after which we are to test the swimming ability of my wee’ lads (she said she even got a new sex toy). Kind of takes the romance out of it doesn’t it? She let me know this via e-mail.

Did you catch that happy horse shit yesterday? I listened to it on NPR and got home and watched the re-caps. Holly Shit that guy was not only incompetent but he’s a whinny asshole/prick as well. Blame the mayor and the governor (and they deserve some) but not own any blame for yourself. Hell I am still to pissed to write about it.

Bush’s plan for the golf recovery. Have you checked it out? With the spending he has proposed the government could write a check for 400,000.00 a person who was affected by the hurricane. I for one think that would be a hell of a good idea, put the money in the hands of the people not into the hands of one of his rich buddy’s companies. One hell of a way to stamp out poverty in the region, and think about the boost in domestic spending, didn’t it go up 20% or something like that when the government sent that “tax-rebate” a few years back, you know when we had a budget surplus.

Today’s Bill:
See first that the design is wise and just: that ascertained, pursue it resolutely; do not for one repulse forego the purpose that you resolved to effect. William Shakespeare

Quote of the Day:
None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone. Ralph Waldo Emerson

I remain the dirty squeegee guy, washing the windshield of your mind:

JQP esq.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

On Why I Quit Seminary:

(Or my “Religious post for the Week”)

God Blames churchsign

Thought for the Day:
Don't worry about avoiding temptation ... as you grow older, it will avoid you.
Winston Churchill

On having the Fundamentalists run things:
I would like to say I have discussed this with my fundamentalist friends, but that would be a lie. I don’t have any fundamentalist friends, a few Jews and one or two Prots but no fundies. That being said their voice remains un-heard on these pages. But fret not; you can always turn on C-SPAN or PTL to see what’s on their daily to-do list.

That being said, I remember them standing in the street corners proudly proclaiming their brand of Christianity, offering up as proof that through prayer their fundie president got into the White House and that God’s hand guides both him and them. That God as they saw him/her would be calling the shots.

Well, let’s just take a little look at that. Under the fundie leadership we have had one major terrorist attack, two wars (on-going) three hurricanes (bet these folks in LA wish W had another brother as their governor, FEMA has their shit together when they roll into Fla. and Texas). More people than ever behind bars, more poor than ever, and our country is more pulled apart over beliefs more than at anytime since the civil war. Sounds like the big-man upstairs is laying out some judgment. But like the Pharisees, those folks just don’t get it.

Whats next:

So here is a great idea for fundie children everywhere, to let them know that God is an angry God, and he is going to stomp their mama and daddies wickedness right along with everyone else.

I should be careful, I don’t think they have the internet at Gimo, or at the Evangelical run Re-Education camps the governor is wanting to set-up in southern Adams County.

I was asked:
“JQP what’s your view on religion?” I replied, do you mean religion or spirituality? I have a few views… first as for “spirituality”, I have seen people use that as a catch all and/or a cop-out, to avoid looking into their place or their souls in the world/life and I have seen people who I know to be very spiritual but not at all religious.

Who the hell am I to judge, to answer it all, I look at it under the gasoline model, I myself am a BP man, I will drive to the next exit just to fill up with BP, it works for me, Pastor Bob is a Marathon fan, and Mrs. JQP is whatever is the cheapest gas buyer. In the end, it doesn’t matter what brand of gas you put in your car, just that you put gas in your car and it runs. Perhaps using this model, I will at sometime apply the high price of gas to it and see what comes up, but that’s something for a later time.

On Prayer:
Now I know it comes as a shock to many of you, but I go to church, well we call it going to Mass and yes, I am involved in my parish. I pray about three times a day, often with the sweet and loving Mrs. JQP. That being said I want to share a little spiritual exercise I did not long ago. I started asking God to keep me strong in the face of temptation, a switch from asking for strength and forgiveness.

About two weeks into this new course of prayerful action, I had temptation hunting my skinny white ass down. Shit Brothers and Sisters, I had old girl friends I had not seen and/or talked to in 5 years calling me up out of the blue wanting a little JQP loving on the side. It taught me a valuable lesson, be very careful what you ask for and don’t be too confident in your abilities. In my experience the good Lord likes humble.

Your God Fearing recipes for the Week:

John the Baptist Snack
• crescent roll dough
• raisins and pretzels
• honey
1. Use Crescent Roll dough and shaped them into "bugs"
2. Use raisins for eyes, pretzel sticks for antennae and legs.
3. After baking, brush them with honey and the children enjoy locusts with honey!

All the Saints Love Red Squash Sambals
(This really is good)

1 pound squash or pumpkin (no, not that tinned stuff: fresh) preferably butternut squash or pumpkin
1 medium onion
2 cups beef stock
Desiccated coconut soaked in half a cup of milk or 6ounces of coconut cream
3 fresh red chilis or1 Habanero or half a capsicum, if you want it mild.
1 dessert teaspoonful of vinegar
Peel, seed, and grate the pumpkin
(although I have just cut it into 1-inch chunks when pressed for time).
Chop the onion very fine and shred the chili into very thin slices.
Boil the pumpkin in the stock until soft enough to mash, drain.
Mash the pumpkin with some butter and stir in all the other ingredients.
Chill the mixture before serving.

Jew’s For Jesus Chicken Paprika:
(a new twist on the Gospel Bird)
Chicken is extremely popular in Israel, because it is relatively inexpensive and can be prepared in many ways. Chicken paprika is, of course, a Hungarian Jewish variation. With the amount of chicken Israelis consume, it is hard to imagine a family going without it for very long.

1 - 4 lb. pullet
3 tbs. flour
2 tbs. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
4 tbs. chicken fat or margarine
1-1/2 cups sliced onion
1 tbs. paprika
1 cup boiling water

Cut up chicken and season with flour, salt and pepper. Brown chicken in the fat (or margarine). Remove chicken and brown onions in remaining fat (or margarine). Return chicken to the pan, sprinkle with paprika and add water. Cover and cook over low heat for 1-1/2 hours or until chicken is tender.

Today’s Bill:
Suspicion always haunts the guilty mind.
William Shakespeare

Quote of the Day:
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. – Socrates

Runner up:
There's only one way to hurt a man who's lost everything. Give him back something broken." ~Stephen R. Donaldson, White Gold Wielder

I remain, not lost when the time comes:

Rev. JQP

Monday, September 26, 2005

More Random Drive by Thoughts on the Weekend:

I was a Hero in High School:
JQP High School Football

On Purple Heart License Plates:
width="240" height="210" alt="Army Medics" / />
When asked how I got wounded in the Army, I always say: “I zigged when I should have zagged”.

Sex in the Corn:
There is something fun about having sex in the middle of a long lonely dark country road in the middle of the night with corn fields all around and the stars above, and even better when it rains while your “doing-it”.

On Career Decisions:
living large carnie style
I have been thinking this morning, I kind of wish I would of become a carnie, I don’t have skill enough to be in the circus, but I think I could pull off being a carnie, hell there are no skills required, drugs, booze, not bathing, poor dental hygiene, everything I own fitting into three Hefty Cinch Sacks, living on the road and best of all the day old Polish sausages and elephant ears I could eat.

Elvis and Cheap Perfume:
poor white trash
My loving wife told me the other day that you can take the boy out of the trailer park, but he will still be a white trash at heart. You know what, she is right, I love me some white trash girls, cheap jewelry and bad tattoos, big hair and a sluty attitude, damn they really make me turn my head.

Having been to Graceland I can see what giving a white trash boy unlimited money can do, the place is tacky as all hell…
Elvis Presley
…but who gives a shit, ol’ boy was the king. That’s what I want an Elvis life style. Shag-carpet on the ceiling, hot chic’s in the bed and a Bentley in the garage. On a side note, I really knew a guy in high school whose given name was Chic, yeap good old Chic Goully, no shit.

Family and Fighting:
girl punch mag
My family gets arrested, yes my family…. They often call for me to bail them out. My little sister started a fight Saturday night at the fair. Oddly, she got her ass kicked, as did her fiancé. I don’t know what it is about the women in my family but you get about 3 drinks in them and they are going to kick someone’s ass.

My flower and I ran into her and other members of my extended family after the reunion, it took all the powers of persuasion I had to keep my pretty and demure wife from running off with those pied pipers of whoop-ass. I had to remind my love that the last time they all went out, it involved calling me from City-County lock up and statements like “who was that bitch I hit” and :who stole one of my shoes”. She came home with me under protest.

Good Friends:
I have one friend form high school, who I am still best friends with, everyone else has been since then, from the Army, from college our just from wherever. My friends are my family, for a lot of years I really didn’t have a lot of contact with those from my blood line, there was a lot of hurtful bad shit that had to be gotten over on both sides, but now we are all making an effort to be a bit closer.
But, as for my friends, I have noticed that those of us who march to the beat of a different drummer, often make family where we are at. Our friends become our brothers and our sisters, people were would lie, cheat and steal for, and in some cases bleed for. One thing that my friends have in common is a sense of honor, they are all about as different as can be imagined, but on that one note they are all the same, very honorable people.

On 20 year old JQP stories:
It seems everyone had a favorite JQP story and wanted to tell it. Now here is what’s odd they were telling it to me. Hell, buddy I was there and I a lot of cases was hoping that people had forgotten most of them. Damn, I got into a lot of fights when I was a kid, but in the environment I grew-up in it was expected.

Sadly, its something that still rears its ugly head from time to time; I am not one to run away from fisticuffs, and people quickly learn that being a liberal democrat doesn’t mean being a pacifist, I can and will kick your ass if need be. Still its God-Damn silly if you ask me. Mrs. JQP described me as a “to smart for his own good idealist who is a very slightly tamed bad boy”. That’s the best I have heard in a long time, so I will go with that.

On being Pimped:
During the night, a family friend told Mrs. JQP she had always had a crush on me and that her man just wasn’t taking her to where she needed to go. My loving wife said, well hell, why don’t you hook-up with him, I could always use the help. Who has 4 hours to give up, I am busy, and quickies for him don’t exist. I don’t know how a feel about that.

I remain the light house for lost souls:

JQP esq.

What a long Strange Trip it’s been:

On not seeing someone in 20 years:
soon tro be fratboys
Dear reader, it was the weekend of my 20th class reunion. Yes, that time when we take stock of who we have become since high school. It was an opportunity to reinforce and completely shatter these dreams of youth.

Let me pant a picture. The event was held down town at the community and visitor’s center on the river, my home town often being called the “Venice of the Wabash”. It was held on the last night of what is called Street Fair. This street fair is a big deal, eagerly awaited all year, a chance to see and be seen.

The city fathers block off the whole town and invite the carnies to rule for a week and every night children, youth and adults pack the humble streets in search of the best fish sandwich and deep fried treat while window shopping for swords and trucker wallets, or perhaps testing their skill at one of the many games of chance.


The more daring stand in line for amusement rides, that are torn down and put back together by toothless men and women with known drug problems and un-executed felony warrants. This was the back drop to my class reunion.

Now a little know fact that men go thought the same emotions as women when it comes to these things. I started off the week saying "fuck it I am not going, I have not missed any of these fuckers in 20 years why the fuck do I want to go". The kind and insistent Mrs. JQP addressed that by saying “I already sent in the money so damn it we are going”. Then I found myself the day of the event, asking “what the hell should I wear”. I went with a Brooks Brothers meets Miami Vice look. Hey, it works for me.

Here is the surprise part, I was nervous just like a job interview. But, I remembered what a wise person told me not to long ago, you don’t have a fucking thing to be ashamed of, you were white trash and now you have made a career out of helping others, when all those pricks made a career out of helping themselves. Good point, but still I was a bit uncomfortable at the out set.

My pretty bride and I arrived on time for the meet and greet. It was odd; I truthfully had not thought of many of those people since we walked across the stage and got our high school diplomas. Perhaps I should add that only 70 or us graduated form this school, I should of known more than I did, but I found myself looking at the little picture ID tags, trying to remember them (perhaps to much LSD in the 80's I asked myself, or is it that these people really dont matter in my life). At one point I thought I was in the wrong class reunion.

I quickly adapted the “Field of Dreams” approach. I found the beer and a table close by it and sat my ass down. “If you build it they will come”. And come they did. I had old high school buddies soon locate at my place of temporary residence. Sadly, it was at this time my pretty (and yes, she looked hot) bride found the box of cheap wine.

Some things I noticed; if you were an ass hole in school, there is about a 90% chance you became an asshole in adulthood. If you were a rich kid, there is a good chance that you’re a doctor or a lawyer and are in fact yourself rich. Very few have been successful in that American of all dreams of climbing up out of poverty and making something big out of yourself. Some people, it seems waited to become who they are, others (myself included) always seemed to know.

Its hard to trade life stories with a bunch of people the only thing you have in common with is the place and years you went to high school, I have done a lot of living since then.

A point about small towns, these folks knew an awful lot about a little world, but not a lot about the big world, outside of vacation spots. Where as myself and my current friends seem to be the opposite. Not saying one is better, just noticing the difference.

Toward the end of the evening, it was like hanging out with a large group of frat-boys. I did make good connections with two old friends from my childhood, both of them can be proud of the men they have become, we will just have to wait and see if those “lets get together for dinner” plans come to fruition.

However, I might add that my flower really impressed everyone, with her command of the English language and her acute personality assessment (i.e. she got drunk and started picking people at random saying things like “I bet your were a real fucking pick in high school” and “did my husband kick your little punk ass in school, because if he didn’t, I think he should tonight” . Yes, I think a few of them might remember my flower. However for the most part, I think once again quite a few of them will slip into obscurity in my own recollections.

Back to work:

JQP esq.

Friday, September 23, 2005

An open letter to you the reader:

Dearest Readers:

I must humbly ask your forgiveness in my being remiss as it pertains to my musings presented here for your edification. Has is often the case in every adults life work can and often does get in the way of those things we enjoy. Such is the case for the past week. I am in the office (under protest) playing a fast passed game of catch up and pass the buck after long drawn out meetings and trainings for a week.

From Monday till Wed. I was in a FBI training, in which I got the shit kicked out of me, so my leg and back are all fucked up, but my ninja skills are greatly improved and yesterday I was hanging with My Man Mitch’s (our 4 foot tall fascist governor) people. Tomorrow, I have my 20 year class reunion, I am taking both my wife and my girl friend, so that should be fun.

Yes, dear read there are many stories to tell from the week, however, I am off to court so sadly they will have to wait.

Until then, all my best!

JQP esq.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Clean Underwear, Public Drunkenness and Rainy Days:

Thought for the Day:
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Oscar Wilde, In Life of Oscar Wilde, H. Pearson
Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 - 1900)

The Day that is:
Today, I have an easy morning planed; I have a few letters to write, then a big training to do. I am flying solo, conducting training for about 150 professionals. Shits and giggles all the way around. After that it’s a mad dash down to Indy for an appointment with the Dr. Frankenstein of Knee Surgeons (and old boy better come across with another script for pain pills, or ya’ll will see old JQP get three shades of ugly).

Mrs. JQP has an event all afternoon Saturday, during which I will travel south to celebrate the birthday of my niece (yes, missing football, but this six year old's birthday trumps sports). Sunday, I am reading at Mass, after which my flower has another event she organized for hurricane victims this one however is in cooperation with the Miller Brewing Company, so I think I will be in attendance.

On Laundry:
Tonight, my bride and I plan to stay in and watch movies. While watching movies she will be doing laundry. Yes, she will be doing the laundry, chiefly because we are out of clean underwear (henceforth the reason I am going commando this brisk morning) but also because she hates how I do laundry. I still fold everything like I did in the army, I also don’t separate colors and I wash everything in hot water.

When we first started living together, the Kind and Passionate Mrs. JQP and I would go to a local Laundromat that was handily located next to a liquor store. We would walk over and buy cheap champagne and orange juice and then make Mimosas, drinking them out of coffee cups and engage in people watching.

laundry day
(I thought you said to “put a quarter in”)

You learn a lot about people in the Laundromat, in some cases to much. We took a pain in the ass task and made it fun, which started me thinking this morning, you know there is something about growing up, buying a house, having your own washer and dryer that can and often does take the simple fun things out of life.

Your Daily Bush Bashing:
Bush is a disaster
(with thanks to Tiny)

A brief recap of the events that encompassed the weekly meeting of No-Love-Thursday:
There was a good turn out of the NLT crew this weekend, with many new representatives of the media and non-for-profit world. The meeting was called to order by M. Chamberlain, Newspaper Man.

In attendance were “Flavia-Puff”, Pastor Bob, myself, the pretty and loving Mrs. JQP, Tiny, Roy Rogers the Radio Guy, (“blank”, I am still coming up with a name for her, she didn’t like “wheel chair pusher”), Double N, and the Angry Redhead.
Officers of NLT
Missing from the meeting were; Sky Captain, Johnny Vanilla, Colorado Joe, Tony Two Times, The Dudgeon and Dragons Player of the Week, Irizarry, plus some of the usual camp followers. Our group was well (if not over) served by Joel the Barman, Hippy Chic, and later into the night by the Catholic Church Lady.

Pastor Bob started the meeting as expected by challenging the legitimacy of “Flavia-Puff”. He used the fact that she wanted to be the leader. Now it’s a well know fact that many of us in the mid-west feel that anyone who wants to be in charge of something should be denied. Leaders should be drafted, think of how that simple rule would change the face of modern politics as always Pastor Bob had a point.

However several of us were pulled away (Pastor Bob included) from the meeting to go to the Museum across town and listen to the great minds of the hollowed halls of our institution of higher learning hold fourth on the events of the day with fellow alums.

Much to my dismay, they didn’t have those little cocktail weenies, just meatballs and some kind of chicken wrap. However the free beer more than made up for it. After a bit we returned to meeting, with pockets full of complementary items.

In our absence, “Flavia-Puff” worked the crowd, winning over even the most cynical among us, with party games such as the "guess my cup size", and "if you were an element on the periodical chart what element would you be and why?" Yes, we at NLT also select our leaders for their entertainment value. A vote was held and much to Pastor Bob’s shock, “Flavia-Puff” was retained by an overwhelming majority. Other appointments were made, but they remain cloudy to me at this early hour, I will trust my fellow members as always to fill in the blanks.

The meeting ended with a sing-a-long. Needless to say, a good time was had by one and all.

On Mornings:
I as a rule awake at 3:50 am, everyday, even those days when I get to bed at 2:30 am. I picked up this habit I believe while in the service of this great land and have learned to enjoy my quiet time. I start everyday with a pot of coffee, Folgers French Roast, nothing fancy for me. Followed with a simple meal of smoked meats and pickled farm produce, I then divide my attention between CNN, NPR and over 52 newspapers I read online. After which I come to these pages.

I was asked why I blog last night (since there were several other bloggers among us). I have a pat answer “So, I don’t go nuts” but truth be known, I don’t know why I do, it’s obvious to you the reader it isn’t to show case my spelling and/or grammar skills. I guess a better explanation would be that on-line journals are a form of (for lack of a better descriptor) an emotional/intellectual bowel movement, if you will, freeing me from constipation. Blogger gives me gentle over night relief.

The odd part is that most of what you read here is true, only the names and at times the events themselves have been changed, this is done in order to throw off numerous local, state, federal, and in a few cases international law enforcement agencies (no one wants Interpol on their ass).

Happy Birthday, B.B. King!

On dreams:
Last night I had the same dream over and over again. It involved a young white boy with blonde hair about the age of 7. For some reason, lost to me now, his mother came running to me asking for help, that her son had been shot. I got to him and tried every thing I could think of to save his life but couldn’t, when I looked at myself I could see I was coved in his blood. I site this as further proof that this job has absolutely no effect on me. Nope, I never take any of this shit home with me from work.

Your Drinks For the Weekend:

tray guy

The Ten Quidder
Drink Ingredients:
1 dash Bitters
1 oz. Triple Sec
1 tsp. Blue Curacao
1 1/2 oz. Gin

In an old-fashioned glass almost filled with ice cubes, combine the gin, triple sec, and bitters. Stir well. Pour the Curacao into the center of the drink.

The Marion, Indiana Cocktail

Drink Ingredients:
½ oz Red Hot schnapps
½ oz. Triple Sec
1/2 oz. Apple Brandy
Juice of 1/4 Lemon

Shake all ingredients with ice, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.

Today’s Bill:
Thy words, I grant are bigger, for I wear not, my dagger in my mouth.
William Shakespeare Greatest English dramatist & poet (1564 - 1616)

Quote of the Day:
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.
Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
English humorist & science fiction novelist (1952 - 2001)

I remain, suckling at the hind teat of the body politic:

JQP esq.

Thursday, September 15, 2005


Thought for the Day:
Certainly, travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living.
Miriam Beard

On No-Love-Thursday:
below ground
Today is an event filled day for yours truly. It is my understanding that the meeting of the “No-Love-Thursday Mutual Aid Society and Drinking Club” will commence at 4:00pm at my favorite bar as usual. However there are a few problems. Pastor Bob is still challenging the legitimacy of “Flavia-Puff” as leader of our merry band and his subversive rhetoric is gaining steam and favor with other members.

trouble afoot
(Left to Right: Pastor Bob, JQP esq., M. Chamberlain, Newspaperman)

It all depends on if she shows up to represent herself. If not I feel a coup might take place and I fear the ramifications. Who will pay for the complementary drinks?

At six, there is an event being put on by my alumni assn. that will be featuring one of my favorite professors. The event will be held at our local historical museum, replete with free beer and wine, meat balls and those little cocktail weenies (god, I love those). So, about half the membership of NLF will be leaving the bar to go and pay homage to our institution of higher learning and in my case the place I still write checks to every month.

On Subsidized Travel:
Mrs JQP getting some sun
Several years ago my loving wife and I came upon a way to enjoy vacations at free or at the least at very reduced rates. It occurred to me one day when we were playing around with Monster, looking at the jobs listed. We started talking about all the places we would like to visit and I suggested that “What the hell, lets apply”.

Thus started our career in subsidized travel. It’s rather simple find a place you want to visit, hit the job adds for that location; send your stuff to them. They see what I high speed go getter you are (and I know you are, or you wouldn’t be reading this blog) and offer to fly you out for an interview.

This is where some lessons learned might be helpful. If your single, take them up on the fly thing but realize that you will most likely have a next day return ticket, however this can also be great for get away weekends if you like traveling alone (I do). I however recommend that you drive and have them reimburse you for gas and lodging.

Now, here are some of the perks, they often put you up someplace real nice in a effort to impress you and when they reimburse you they often pay cash (always ask, so you know what to budget).
FLA is priceless
This way you have a chance to check out to local lifestyle, relax and hey piss on it if you don’t get the job, you got a free trip out of the deal. Just an idea, it works for us. And its great during those cold winters, to “interview” for the weekend in Palm Springs etc...

Your Political Comment for the Day:
horse fly, horses ass
“Horse Fly meets Horses Ass”

On why I am a Prick at Work:
Ok, it never fails. If I walk into work in a good mood within 10 mins. someone has done something to piss me right the fuck off. In this case it’s once again office politics. I just got a long e-mail about how I didn’t follow a procedure.

Nope, I didn’t follow it, for two reasons, one I was not aware of it and yes I was able to prove it, I have this persons e-mails to me going back 4 years (I am one of those pricks who keep a file on everyone, so don’t fuck with me), and second…it’s fucking stupid.

This involves three people whose offices are right next to me. Right f’ing next to me! Come on, you couldn’t of pulled your head out of your ass and stuck it in the door saying something like “Hey, JQP we got a little problem” no, had we to get a shit load of ppl. involved etc…

Silly office politics, it takes away from the focus on what we should be doing. There I feel better. Thanks for letting me share with the group.

Your free music links for NLT:
Yes, NPR kicks ass....

Quote of the Day:
Never get angry. Never make a threat. Reason with people.
Mario Puzo, 'The Godfather' US novelist & screenwriter (1920 - 1999)

Today’s Bill:
There is a tide in the affairs of men
Which taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
William Shakespeare, "Julius Caesar", Act 4 scene 3

I remain much like salt in a circumcision wound:

JQP esq.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

I got them Gypsy/Back on the Beach Blues:

Thought for the Day:
With reasonable men I will reason; with humane men I will plea; but to tyrants I will give no quarter, nor waste arguments where they will certainly be lost.
William Lloyd Garrison US abolitionist & editor (1805 - 1879)

On Last Night:
Toward the end of my shift here at the Salt Mine, I received a call on the Land-Line down in Shaft #3. It was M. Chamberlain, Newspaper Man. He suggested that after my time in the decompression chamber I join him at my favorite bar for a pint of bitter ale.

For starters, in my opinion there is no such thing as bitter ale; bitter is an adjective that best describes the women that I once had relations with, not beer.
However, I agreed to his suggestion.

Upon my arrival, I was greeted warmly, has only a regular who is a well known big tipper can be. Big, tipper, you ask yourself? Yes, dear reader I am a big tipper. It must be so, you see I look at it has insurance. Yes, often people ask my views on subjects of the day and if well lubricated my self-editor does not function at the high levels it usually does. I tend to be truthful and forthright, which is often not what they really wanted to hear. Often this leads to a lively debate, of which I am not prone to suffer fools.

Last night for instance; I was holding forth about the state of our great land, blaming it of course on fluoride in the water, women working outside of the home, ponies, flypaper, and the world bank. I mean everyone knows that.

Yes, dear friends, I was on a roll and a few pain killers washed down with rot-gut rye whiskey (otherwise know as a Jim Morrison Cocktail) effectively shut down any pretence of self editing. Yes, I made Fr. O’Lush cry. Well, it’s his own fault, he should not of asked me what I thought of the British winning in Cricket, you the reader know I am a like long Australian Cricket fan. It’s at times like this, when you make clergy cry in public at a bar, your glad you’re a big tipper. But, I digress.

What I really wanted to talk about was that last night, the head bar maid came up to me with a stack of raffle tickets (she is also known as the Catholic-Church-Lady, ie: she will not take your drink order if you have not been to Mass, yes, folks this is a very Catholic town, in truth there are a shit load of Lutherans here to, but that’s a story for another time). She said that she had been hoping to see me and that since I was Irish (she is of German decent) and that she knew I would I would help with this raffle.

Being a public minded man, I agreed, so now I am selling tickets for a raffle held in Ireland. The proceeds go to a Catholic school in Belfast. Off I went on my appointed task.


Being Irish, I know where to find my fellow Paddy’s. The bars. I had a great deal of success, the only people who refused my opportunity to help the poor wee’ children in Belfast buy bullet proof vests for their Step Dancing Team, were a few Protestants.

I was however, taken aback, by my host of the evening, M. Chamberlain, Newspaper Man, a man of both great influence and affluence. When he refused my offer of allowing him the opportunity to win one of many prizes in support of the children of Gaelscoil an Lonnain. Who wouldn’t want an autographed copy of an Irish Rovers CD?

He said, “Wait a minute, weren’t you guys the ones who resealed my drive-way last year?” and “Fixed my mother’s roof” you bastards! I want my 9,000.00 dollars back”. I had to shake him to bring him back into reality. Reminding him that it was my cousin from the Carolinas not me, I had not been in the traveling home repair business (AARP members receive a special discount) for years and that all of the charges were dropped in Minnesota. However, it was around that time in my life I developed a wanderlust for travel, one, which has stayed with me till this day.

The Importance of Good Guidance:
My high school guidance counselor once told me that among my problems chief was a lack of goals (he also included that I was white trash and a punk part-time student). So, in an effort to live up to those high standards he set for me today I am going to set a goal: To travel, to get away, to live out of a bag, sleeping in the back of a white 1963 Ford Econo-line van.
63 Ford
Yes, Living off of cheap red wine, cheese-wiz and saltine crackers. Seeing this great land and living life to the fullest. Think Easy Rider without the bugs in my teeth.
easy rider
This is my goal; this dear reader is my dream.

Your Recipe for the Week:
JQP’s Asian Half-Brother’s Cashew Chicken Stuffed Tomato’s
If you're planning buffet for a dozen, double the recipe.

1 cup coarsely broken Cashews
6 Large Ripe Tomatoes
1/4 cup salad oil
2 chicken breasts (raw), boned and cut into very small cubes
1 tsp. Montreal Steak Seasoning
1 cup onion cubed
1 1/2 cups cubed celery 1 1/4 cups chicken broth
1 tsp. sugar
1 tbsp. cornstarch
1/4 cup teriyaki sauce
2 tbsp. Tabasco
1 5 oz. can (2/3 cup) bamboo shoots, drained, cubed
1 5 oz. can water chestnuts, drained and cubed

1) In skillet, toast Cashews in hot oil, stirring constantly. remove nuts to paper towels.
2) Put chicken into skillet. Sprinkle with salt. Cook, stirring frequently, 5 to 10 minutes or till tender. Remove chicken.
3) Put onion, celery, and 1/2 cup of the chicken broth in skillet. Cook uncovered 5 minutes or till slightly tender.
4) Core/Hollow-out the Tomatoes, saving the inside to use in something else, leave about ½ or a little less around on the inside.
5)Combine sugar, cornstarch, soy sauce, and cooking sherry; add remaining chicken broth. Pour over vegetables in skillet. Cook till sauce thickens.
6) Add chicken, bamboo shoots, water chestnuts, and walnuts. Heat through. 5 mins. Then chill for 10 or 15 mins.
7) Pack the Chicken mixture into the Tomatoes and serve. Damn tasty and something different.
(I got home form my charitable activities last night around 6:00pm and whipped this little wonder up for my sweet and loving bride, I should note for some of my readers that you can use ‘bout any meat, snake, rat, fish, all but beef, for this dish beef just don’t work)

Your Bill for the Day:
This royal throne of kings, this sceptred isle,
This earth of majesty, this seat of Mars,
This other Eden, demi-paradise,
This fortress built by Nature for herself
Against infection and the hand of war,
This happy breed of men, this little world,
This precious stone set in the silver sea,
Which serves it in the office of a wall
Or as a moat defensive to a house,
Against the envy of less happier lands,--
This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.
William Shakespeare, "King Richard II", Act 2 scene 1
(In honor of the Brits. Beating the Aussies in Cricket, the winner got a thimble full of ashes and yes this was a big deal to those primitive people.)

Quote for the Day:
Passive acceptance of the teacher's wisdom is easy to most boys and girls. It involves no effort of independent thought, and seems rational because the teacher knows more than his pupils; it is moreover the way to win the favour of the teacher unless he is a very exceptional man. Yet the habit of passive acceptance is a disastrous one in later life. It causes man to seek and to accept a leader, and to accept as a leader whoever is established in that position.
Bertrand Russell British author, mathematician, & philosopher (1872 - 1970)

You may say I am a dreamer, but I’m not the only one, I remain:

JQP esq.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Bush Bashing is fun and good for you!

Lifted from my good friend Tiny at


Sent: Sunday, September 11, 2005 2:36 AM
Subject: A Letter to All Who Voted for George W. Bush from Michael Moore

To All My Fellow Americans Who Voted for George W. Bush:

On this, the fourth anniversary of 9/11, I'm just curious, how does it feel?How does it feel to know that the man you elected to lead us after we were attacked went ahead and put a guy in charge of FEMA whose main qualification was that he ran horse shows?

That's right. Horse shows.I really want to know -- and I ask you this in all sincerity and with all due respect -- how do you feel about the utter contempt Mr. Bush has shown for your safety? C'mon, give me just a moment of honesty. Don't start ranting on about how this disaster in New Orleans was the fault of one of the poorest cities in America.

Put aside your hatred of Democrats and liberals and anyone with the last name of Clinton. Just look me in the eye and tell me our President did the right thing after 9/11 by naming a horse show runner as the top man to protect us in case of an emergency or catastrophe.I want you to put aside your self-affixed label of Republican/conservative/born-again/capitalist/ditto-head/right-winger and just talk to me as an American, on the common ground we both call America.

Are we safer now than before 9/11? When you learn that behind the horse show runner, the #2 and #3 men in charge of emergency preparedness have zero experience in emergency preparedness, do you think we are safer?

When you look at Michael Chertoff, the head of Homeland Security, a man with little experience in national security, do you feel secure?

When men who never served in the military and have never seen young men die in battle send our young people off to war, do you think they know how to conduct a war? Do they know what it means to have your legs blown off for a threat that was never there?

Do you really believe that turning over important government services to private corporations has resulted in better services for the people?Why do you hate our federal government so much? You have voted for politicians for the past 25 years whose main goal has been to de-fund the federal government.

Do you think that cutting federal programs like FEMA and the Army Corps of Engineers has been good or bad for America? GOOD OR BAD?With the nation's debt at an all-time high, do you think tax cuts for the rich are still a good idea? Will you give yours back so hundreds of thousands of homeless in New Orleans can have a home?Do you believe in Jesus? Really? Didn't he say that we would be judged by how we treat the least among us?

Hurricane Katrina came in and blew off the facade that we were a nation with liberty and justice for all. The wind howled and the water rose and what was revealed was that the poor in America shall be left to suffer and die while the President of the United States fiddles and tells them to eat cake.That's not a joke. The day the hurricane hit and the levees broke, Mr. Bush, John McCain and their rich pals were stuffing themselves with cake. A full day after the levees broke (the same levees whose repair funding he had cut), Mr. Bush was playing a guitar some country singer gave him.

All this while New Orleans sank under water. It would take ANOTHER day before the President would do a flyover in his jumbo jet, peeking out the window at the misery 2500 feet below him as he flew back to his second home in DC. It would then be TWO MORE DAYS before a trickle of federal aid and troops would arrive. This was no seven minutes in a sitting trance while children read "My Pet Goat" to him.

This was FOUR DAYS of doing nothing other than saying "Brownie (FEMA director Michael Brown), you're doing a heck of a job!"My Republican friends, does it bother you that we are the laughing stock of the world?And on this sacred day of remembrance, do you think we honor or shame those who died on 9/11/01? If we learned nothing and find ourselves today every bit as vulnerable and unprepared as we were on that bright sunny morning, then did the 3,000 die in vain?Our vulnerability is not just about dealing with terrorists or natural disasters.

We are vulnerable and unsafe because we allow one in eight Americans to live in horrible poverty. We accept an education system where one in six children never graduate and most of those who do can't string a coherent sentence together. The middle class can't pay the mortgage or the hospital bills and 45 million have no health coverage whatsoever.Are we safe? Do you really feel safe? You can only move so far out and build so many gated communities before the fruit of what you've sown will be crashing through your walls and demanding retribution. Do you really want to wait until that happens?

Or is it your hope that if they are left alone long enough to soil themselves and shoot themselves and drown in the filth that fills the street that maybe the problem will somehow go away?I know you know better. You gave the country and the world a man who wasn't up for the job and all he does is hire people who aren't up for the job.

You did this to us, to the world, to the people of New Orleans. Please fix it. Bush is yours. And you know, for our peace and safety and security, this has to be fixed. What do you propose?I have an idea, and it isn't a horse show.

Yours, Michael Moore

And this from Dobbs:

The Bush Crime Family:Four Generations of Wall Street War-Making and War-Profiteering August, 2004
By Dr. Eric Karlstrom

I. Introduction
Henry Ford, founder of Ford Motor Company, once stated there are two classes of financiers: 1) Those who profit from war and use their influence to bring about war for profit, and 2) "constructive" financiers. Ford Motor Co., along with about 100 other major U.S. banks and corporations, belongs to the first group (see C. Higham's Trading with the Enemy). Indeed, Ford himself was actually decorated by the Nazis for his service to Nazism.

Other prominent international banking families that simultaneously bankrolled Hitler, Stalin, and Roosevelt during the first half of the 20th century include the Rockefellers (Standard Oil Company, Chase Bank), the Rothschilds, the Schiffs, the Warburgs, and the Bushes, among others.

Why would the world's richest individuals simultaneously fund communism in Russia, fascism in Germany, and socialist democracy in the United States? Georgetown historian Carrol Quigley put it this way: "The powers of financial capitalism had a far reaching aim, nothing less than to create a world system of financial control in private hands able to dominate the political system of each country and the economy of the world as a whole." These financial powers had learned that war is the most profitable of all businesses and also the most effective means of changing the global political landscape. Thus, over the past 2 centuries at least, they have covertly manipulated politicians and nations into wars. Their ultimate goal was and is to establish a "New World Order", a totalitarian one-world government ruled by the very few and very rich, i.e., them. Des Griffin has termed this a "Fourth Reich of the Rich" (Griffin, 1976). George Orwell and Aldous Huxley described what such a world might look like in their classic novels, 1984 and Brave New World.

President George Herbert Walker Bush was not the first or only prominent man to proclaim this "New World Order". Hitler, President Woodrow Wilson, author H.G. Wells and innumerable other politicians, writers and businessmen have also heralded its immanent arrival. David Rockefeller, Chairman of Chase Manhattan Bank and arguably the most powerful American of the last half-century, proclaimed: "We are on the verge of a global transformation. All we need is the right major crisis and the nations will accept the New World Order."

Among the most pro-active implementers of this centuries-old project to establish a one-world government are the Bush family, two of which have risen to become U.S. presidents. A brief summary of their major accomplishments should be sufficient to indicate that their activities constitute the highest crimes against the people of the United States and humanity.
II. Samuel Prescott Bush (1863-1948: George W. Bush's great grandfather). Founder of the Buckeye Steel Castings Company in 1894, Remington Arms Company, and Chief of the Ordnance, Small Arms and Ammunition Section of the War Industries Board for World War I.

In 1918, just after the US entered World War I, Bush became chief of the Ordnance, Small Arms and Ammunition Section of the War Industries Board. In this capacity, he sold weapons made by manufacturers such as his own Remington Arms Company to 75% of the WWI combatants on both sides. Congressional committee hearings in 1934 by U.S. Senator Gerald Nye attacked Bush and other weapons salesmen as war profiteers and "Merchants of Death." Salesmen from these companies had helped to manipulate the nations into World War I and then made astronomical profits from the sales of the weapons, at the taxpayer's expense of course. In 1914, the German army under the Kaiser, armed mainly by Samuel Bush, was the largest and best armed in the world. After WWI, the German army was forced to disarm, but Bush was allowed to keep his many millions, and his arms business thrived. In 1944, Bush was awarded a huge government contract to make armor casings for WWII. Most of the records and correspondence of Samuel Bush's arms deals have been burned "to save space" in the National Archives. This pattern of the systematic deletion of large portions of the public records is typical of all the Bushes.

III. George Herbert Walker (George W. Bush's other great grandfather): Wall Street banker and director or president of G.H. Walker and Co., J.P. Morgan and Co., Guaranty Trust Co., W.A. Harriman and Co., and Union Banking Corporation.

Walker made his fortune building up the Soviet Union and Nazi Germany, financing their oil, coal, steel, and manganese industries, among others. As President of Union Banking Corp. (UBC), he laundered money for Hitler and supplied raw materials essential for Germany's waging World War II. His most prominent partners in financing Hitler's war machine were Averell Harriman and Prescott Bush. Together, they ran Harriman-Walker, the Hamburg-Amerika Line (a cover for I.G. Farben's Nazi espionage unit in the U.S.), the American Ship and Commerce Co. (which smuggled German agents, propaganda, and money into America to bribe American politicians to support the Nazi cause), the Harriman Fifteen Corporation, and the Silesian Holding Company. In addition, their Consolidated Silesian Steel Corporation owned 1/3 of a complex of steel-making, coal-mining, and zinc-mining activities in Germany. (Friederich Flick owned two-thirds and was sentenced to 7 years imprisonment by the Nuremburg Tribunal, but the American partners were never tried). The Nazi army was equipped by Flick, Harriman, Walker, and Bush with materials stolen from Poland. Meanwhile, Soviet army vehicles were fueled by oil pumped from Baku wells revived by the Harriman/Walker/Bush enterprise.

When the U.S. government seized the Silesian-American Corp. in 1942 under the "Trading with the Enemy Act," George Herbert Walker was still the senior director of the company.
IV. Prescott Sheldon Bush (George W. Bush's grandfather; 1885-1972, Yale, Skull & Bones, class of 1917): Wall Street banker, Vice President of W. A. Harriman and Co., and director or senior partner in Union Banking Corporation (UBC) and Brown Brothers, Harriman, and a manager of Silesian-American Corp., the Holland-American Trading Corp. and the Seamless Steel Equipment Corporation, which were Nazi front organizations run by the Bush-Harriman bank, UBC.

Although Union Banking Corporation (UBC) was exposed as a de facto Nazi front organization by the U.S. government in Congressional hearings, Prescott Bush, Harriman, and George Herbert Walker continued doing business with the Nazis for 8 months after the U.S. entered World War II. When the US government seized control of UBC under the "Trading with the Enemy Act," all the shares were owned by Prescott Bush, E. Roland Harriman, three Nazi executives, and two other Bush associates (Four of the eight directors were members of Skull and Bones, class of 1917). The US government also seized several subsidiaries run by the Bush-Harriman bank (UBC), including The Holland-American Trading Corp., the Seamless Steel Equipment Corp, the Silesian-American Corp., and the Harriman Fifteen Holding Company and determined that huge sections of Prescott Bush's empire were operated on behalf of Nazi Germany and had greatly assisted the Nazi war effort.

Bush and his partners profited greatly from the slave labor at Auschwitz via a partnership with I.G. Farben, the third largest business in Germany under Hitler. U.S. government reports also indicate that UBC was an interlocking concern with the German Steel Trust and Congressional reports show that German Steel Trust furnished the Nazi government with 51% of its pig iron, 41.4% of its universal plat, 36% of heavy plate, 38.5% of galvanized plate, 42.5% of pipes and tubes, 22.1% of wire, and 35% of explosives. Bush and Harriman each received $1.5 million in compensation for their seized assets.

This story has been suppressed by the US media. And it has not appeared in any of the major Bush family biographies. However, not only were Prescott Bush and the other directors of UBC legally front men for the Nazis, they hired, armed and instructed Hitler's Nazi army. (Adolf Hitler, once a destitute artist who lived in flop houses, came to power with a private army of 300,000 to 400,000 men, which included the Brown Shirts).

Prescott Bush later served as a director of Columbia Broadcasting System, Inc., Prudential Insurance, Dresser Industries, Inc., Hydrocarbon Research, Inc., Wanadium Corp. of America, and U.S. Guaranty Trust, among other companies, until 1952 when he was elected U.S. Senator from Connecticut.

Conclusion: A major part of the Bush family fortune is due to the "Hitler Project", which included the slave labor and Holocaust at Auschwitz.

V. George Herbert Walker Bush (George W. Bush's father; 1924- present, Yale, Skull & Bones, class of 1948).

Our 41st president's political life has been intertwined with four of the most powerful and profitable business enterprises on the planet: banking, oil, the arms/intelligence industries, and sales of illegal drugs. He began his career as an oil salesman for Dresser Industries and went on to co-found his own oil company, Zapata Petroleum Corp. of Houston. This would spin off to Zapata Offshore and Pennzoil/Zapata. Bush was president of Zapata Oil from 1954 to 1964 and Zapata Offshore from 1964 to 1966.

Persistent reports indicate Bush was also an undercover CIA agent in the early 60's, playing a prominent role in the "Bay of Pigs" invasion of Cuba (code name: Operation Zapata) in 1961 and probably the Kennedy assassination in 1963. Newly released FBI documents place Bush in Miami in 1960 and 1961, recruiting Cubans for the Bay of Pigs invasion. That's how he met Felix Rodriguez who became part of a special CIA shooter team. George Bush, Howard Hunt, Frank Sturgis, and Richard Nixon have all been traced to Dallas on Nov. 22, 1963, the day of Kennedy's assassination. Hunt and Sturgis were among the 6 to 8 "derelicts" or "hobos" found in boxcars near railroad tracks behind the grassy knoll near Dealy Plaza. But they were never finger-printed or photographed in association with Kennedy's murder.

Bush was elected to Congress in 1966, but lost a bid for the Senate in 1970. Even so, Nixon appointed him ambassador to the UN in 1971. Here he took orders from Henry Kissinger (who worked for the Rockefeller interests) and became a Kissinger-clone. In 1973, Nixon appointed him Republican National Chairman, where he seems to have played an important, behind-the-scenes role in the Watergate Scandal. Then, as Ambassador to China, Bush helped Kissinger oust Cambodian leader Lon Nol and install Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge. More than 2 of a total 7 million Cambodians perished under Pol Pot, an estimated 32% of the population.

In 1976, Bush became Director of the CIA. When elected Vice President in 1980, he put his family fortune into a blind trust under the control of his close friend, William Stamps Farish, III, who also had inherited much of the Auschwitz death camp fortune. (Farish's grandfather was president of Standard Oil and controller of the global cartel between Standard Oil and the German I.G. Farben Corp., which operated the Auschwitz slave labor camps to produce artificial rubber and gasoline from coal. There, Jews and political opponents of Hitler were worked to death or murdered.)

Some of Bush's other notable, but generally under-reported, contributions include:
1) Helping to orchestrate the "October Surprise," in which the Iranian government was bribed or coerced into holding the American hostages until after the 1980 election, thereby helping to ensure Carter's defeat and a Reagan/Bush victory.

2) The assassination attempt on Ronald Reagan two months after he took office. The Hinkley family, a Houston oil family, are long-time friends of the Bushes.

3) Presiding over the Savings and Loan/HUD scandal, in which taxpayers were made to pay over $500 billion for bailing out failed S&Ls. Son Neil Bush, director of Silverado Savings and Loan in Denver, is reported to have personally profited by about $1 billion.

4) As VP and therefore Head of the National Security Council's Groups on Crisis Management, Drug Addiction, and Terrorism, Bush directed the Iran-Contra drug scandal, in which the secret government (comprised of ex-CIA and military intelligence operatives and businessmen) diverted profits from illegal arms sales to Iran to illegally fund the revolutionary Contras of Nicaragua and the Mujahadeen of Afghanistan. Under CIA protection, these covert operators flew vast quantities of cocaine and heroin into the poor neighborhoods of America, again using drug profits to fund the illegal covert war in Nicaragua, etc.

5) Under Bush's watch, the CIA spent over $3 billion dollars fomenting holy war ("Jihad") and training and funding the Mujahadeen terorists (including Osama bin Laden), their networks, and training camps in Afghanistan. Thus, the Taliban, the Mujahadeen, and Osama bin Laden were established as CIA assets and remain so to this day. Not coincidentally, under CIA supervision during the 80's, Afghanistan became the number one heroin producer and exporter in the world. In 2000, the Taliban government banned the production of poppies (heroin). However, after the recent invasion of Iraq and installation of an American puppet government, Afghanistan is again the number heroin producer in the world.

6) Under Bush's supervision of the first "War on Terrorism," hundreds of thousands of Innocent civilians were killed, tortured and disappeared in El Salvador, Guatemala, and Nicaragua. Another million or so each, again mostly civilians, were killed in the U.S.-supported and funded wars in Afghanistan and Iraq/Iran.

7) Presiding over invasions into both Panama and Iraq in which some 8000 Panamanians and over 200,000 Iraqis were killed. The U.S had illegally sold tens of billions of dollars worth of weapons, including chemical and biological weapons, to Saddam Hussein during the 80's to help him build the strongest regional power in the Middle East. Evidence indicates that Saddam was more or less set up for the Gulf War when U.S. Ambassador Glaspie told him the U.S. had no interest in his border dispute with Kuwait. I.e., it was a trap.

However, there were also perks for this hardworking politician/businessman. According to retired Brigadier General Bowen (in The Immaculate Deception: The Bush Crime Family Exposed), Bush and Saddam Hussein split about $250 billion in Persian Gulf oil kickbacks during the 1980's, which were laundered through the scandal-ridden Bank of Credit and Commerce International (BCCI).

In 1988, Project Censored awarded the honor of "Top Censored Story" to the story of George Bush, revealing "how the major mass media ignored, overlooked or under-covered at least ten critical stories reported in America's alternative press that raised serious questions about the Republican candidate, George Bush, dating from his reported role as a CIA "asset" in 1963 to his Presidential campaign's connection with a network of anti-Semites with Nazi and fascist affiliations in 1988."

Today, Bush Sr. is a highly-paid consultant for the Carlyle Group, America's 11th largest military contractor. In this capacity, he went to Saudi Arabia to meet with the Bin Laden family and the Saudi Royal family in 1998 and 2000. The Carlyle Group stands to make billions of dollars from Jr. Bush's "War on Terror." Thus, Bush Sr. is still profiteering handsomely from his insider connections.

VI. George W. Bush (1946-present, Yale, Skull & Bones, class of 1968).

As governor of Texas, the 43rd president of the United States presided over the execution of 52 inmates, including mentally retarded prisoners- more than any other governor in US history. He did, however, pardon one death row prisoner, a serial killer. As governor, he changed pollution laws to benefit energy companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the nation. Some of his other notable contributions include:

1) Presiding over the government's complicity and cover-up of the killing of about 3,000 people at the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001 (see many references below).

2) Presiding over the greatest rollback of Constitutional civil liberties in the history of the country. The Patriot I and Homeland Security Acts, passed in 2001 and 2002, respectively, along with the pending Patriot II Act eliminate or threaten Constitutional rights guaranteed in our 1st, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 13th, 14th, and 15th Amendments (see attachment).

3) The high-tech massacre of many thousands of innocent and defenseless Afghani and Iraqi civilians who posed no security threat to the U.S. whatsoever and had no part in the crimes of 9-11. The two primary resources thereby controlled are opium and an oil pipeline in Afghanistan and, of course, oil in Iraq. The Bush administration, obviously responding to demands from the major oil companies, is clearly pursuing a strategy to dominate the world's last, greatest fossil fuel reserves in the Persian Gulf and Caspian Basin.

4) Leading a "pre-emptive" war against Iraq in violation of international law (including the UN charter, the Nuremburg Tribunal and the Geneva Accords) and on the basis of entirely false pretexts. Representative Henry Waxman (D-CA) carefully documents 237 lies told by the Bush administration in their efforts to convince the American people, the Congress, and the UN to go to war in Iraq. Interestingly, this document is no longer on the web.

5) Proposing an endless "War on Terror" (i.e., military conquest abroad in service of resource looting for international corporations and a police state at home to suppress dissent), when, in fact, evidence shows that the "War on Terror" is a fraud and that the greatest purveyor of terror in the world, by far, is the U.S. government, with its CIA, School of the Americas, etc.

6) Presiding over the loss, mostly by outsourcing, of some 2.5 million American jobs in his first two years in office.

7) Granting trillions of dollars worth of tax cuts to the richest 2% of Americans. Thereby, spending the $7 trillion surplus he inherited from Clinton and allowing the federal deficit to exceed a record $7 trillion, mainly by granting gigantic tax cuts to the rich and making huge increases in military spending.

8) Presiding over one of the greatest Wall Street scandals (and stock market crashes) of all time (the Enron scandal, the creation of artificial gas shortages in California, etc.).

9) De-funding and thereby further crippling our education, social services, health care, etc.

10) The worst environmental record of any U.S. president in history, including the systematic weakening and rollback of all major environmental laws and regulations.

VII. Conclusion
Four generations of Bushes have been instrumental, along with other Wall Street and international bankers, in creating and financing a series of great enemies (including the Soviets, the Nazis, Ho Chi Minh, Saddam Hussein, and Osama bin Laden). They and their international business partners, which typically include enemy leaders, have reaped tremendous profits from the wars they have orchestrated. The Bushes have been intimately involved in all the most profitable businesses, including banking (usury), energy (oil), sales of illicit drugs, and weapons/intelligence. Three generations of Bushes have been involved in America's most elite secret society, Yale's Skull and Bones, which many believe to be Satanic. The "Great Plan" which they have been working so hard to usher in calls for the destruction of the United States of America as a sovereign nation and the establishment of a "New World Order", effectively a "Fourth Reich of the Rich." Thus, they are all guilty of the highest crimes against humanity and the American people.

Rough tally of humans killed by the New World Order so far:

World War I 21 million
World War II 25 million
Korean War 1 million
Southeast Asian Wars (Vietnam, Laos and Cambodia)6 million
Iraq War (1991-2004) nearly 2 million
Afghanistan Wars of 1980s and 2001 over 1 million
Other miscellaneous Third World Warsover 5 million
Russians killed in one decade in WWI And under Lenin and Stalin75 million
Chinese killed by Mao Tse Tung 100 milllion
Rough total over 236 million

It seems obvious that unless and until the Bush dynasty and their associates (international bankers, corporate and military leaders, secret societies, etc.) are exposed and brought to justice, they will continue to orchestrate and profit from future wars to the detriment of all humanity.

Ahmed, N.M., 2002. The War on Freedom: How and Why America was Attacked September 11, 2001, Media Messenger Books, 398 pp.
Andreas, J., 2002, Addicted to War: Why the U.S. Can't Kick Militarism, AK Press, Oakland.
Bowen, R.W., 1991, The Immaculate Deception; The Bush Crime Family Exposed, America West Publishers, 210 pp.
Brewton, P., 1992, The Mafia, CIA, and George Bush, S.P.I. Books, 418 pp.
Burbach, R., and Clark, B., 2002, September 11 and the U.S. War: Beyond the Curtain of Smoke, City Lights Books, San Francisco, 174 pp.
Chossudovsky, M., 2002, War and Globalization: The Truth Behind September 11, Global Outlook, 158 pp.
Dowbenko, U., 2003, Bushwhacked: Inside Stories of True Conspiracy, Conspiracy Digest, LLC 357 pp.
Griffin, D., 1976, Fourth Reich of the Rich, Emissary Publications.
Griffin, D.R., 2004, The New Pearl Harbor: Disturbing Questions about the Bush Administration and 9/11. Olive Branch Press, 214 pp.
Higham, C., 1983, Trading with the Enemy: An Expose of the Nazi-American Money Plot 1933- 1949, Delacorte Press, New York, 277 pp.
Hufschmidt, E., 2002, Painful Questions: An Analysis of the September 11 Attack, Endpoint Software, Goleta, CA, 154 pp.
Klein, N., 2004, Baghdad year zero: Pillaging Iraq in pursuit of neocon utopia, Harpers, vol. 309, no. 1852, 43-53.
Meyssen, T., 9/11 The Big Lie, Carnot Publishing, Ltd., 236 pp.
Millegan, K.Ed., Fleshing Out Skull and Bones: Investigations into America's Most Powerful Secret Society. 712 pp.
Paul, D., 2002, "9/11": Facing our Fascist State & What a Plot!, Irresistable/Revolutionary, San Francisco, 144 pp.
Scheer, C., Scheer, R., and Chaudhry, L., 2003, The Five Biggest Lies Bush Told us about Iraq, Seven Stories Press, 174 pp.
Sutton, A.C., 1975, Wall Street and the Rise of Hitler, Bloomfield Books.
Sutton, A.c., 1986, America's Secret Establishment: An Introduction to the Order of Skull and Bones, Trine Day, 317 pp.
Tarpley, W. and Chaitkin, A., 1992, George Bush: The Unauthorized Biography, Executive Intelligence Review, 659 pp.

On Halliburton, Razor Blades and Sweet Tea:

Thought for the Day:
Doubt 'til thou canst doubt no more...doubt is thought and thought is life. Systems which end doubt are devices for drugging thought.
Albert Guerard

This Just In:
Sewer rat does in fact taste just like Pumpkin Pie!”

Public Service Announcement:
At the Request of both Dusty and the compassionate and animal loving Mrs. JQP:
Go help save some pets form the disaster.

On Bush and Tall Cotton:
Ok, I have pretty much kept my mouth shut on the topic of the hurricane (well, unless you have run into me after I have a beer or two in me, I find that there are very few things I keep my mouth shut about under those circumstances).

However since everyone has been talking about it non-stop I think its time I jump in. First, a long time ago, I once worked for the Red Cross and have been to my share of disasters, folks let me fill you in on a little known fact, they are called "disasters" not "bad days" for a reason.

Things are fucked up. Its always a pissing contest to see who is in charge of what and who can do what. That being said, things normally work out in the end, not the way the victims want them to, but to the best available.

However, this has been a cluster-fuck from the get go. Hell, I remember talking about this same event when I was in that business. Yes, has the media has made you aware a lot of good people who know their ass from a hole in the ground have been working this problem for a long time, it’s just that no one gave a shit (talking about bad shit that could happen is bad for business, dont you know). We got caught flat footed and with our pants down, and as always it’s the poor who are getting screwed the hardest.

Now the old boy from FEMA, you know the guy whose last job was heading up the American Arabian Horse Asst. resigned. The thing that gets me is that people are surprised that someone that incompetent was calling the shots in the absence of leadership from Washington/Texas (now in W’s defense its hard to lead when your hiding from a mother down at the end of your drive way).

Folks, all we had to do to see how well this administration plans is look at our win in Iraq. One hell of a win, at least this disaster has pushed the troops getting killed daily off the front page. Obviously, to anyone who has ever watched more than four hours of the History Channel these folks have no clue.

Planning anything more than a fund-raiser or a tax cut for the top 10% of the national population and these ol’ boys are in over their head (the simple questions, …what if? …and then? has never occurred to them).

Well, anyway there is at least some constancy; I noticed that Halliburton & Company, have already gotten some no-bid contacts.

Like Forest Gump, that all I got to say about that.

On having Fun with Puberty:
I hate shaving, that’s why since 1990 in have had a beard or goatee (goatee since the beautiful and assertive Mrs. JQP came into my life, with the edict the beard=no-sex) with the exception of when I was called back up to protect and defend the interests of this great nation. This came home for me this morning when I cut myself shaving, noticing it of course only after I had blood all over my white shirt.

Like I said, I hate shaving.

One of the rituals a boy looks forward to is shaving just like dad. I remember when I grew my first two hairs on my chin, first thing I did was rush down stairs lock myself in the bathroom and grab the old-man’s safety razor. I always wondered why they call them safety razors, because there is nothing safe about the 1948 model he used.

Needless to say I cut the holy-hell out of my face. So much in fact my mother later said “it looked like someone was butchering chickens in the sink”.

The sight I made on my exit from the water-closet with about half a roll of toilet paper stuck to my face, in a vain effort to stop the flow of blood, was quite amusing to my family as they sat enjoying breakfast, in fact causing my mother to spit out her coffee. Such is the compassion of a close knit family unit as ours.

I might add this was the first day of Jr. High (see how old I am, we called it Jr. High, not Middle School). …and so started, the first day of the most trauma-rich period of anyone’s educational career. I was quickly known as the "kid-who-looked-like-he-got-shot-with-a-shotgun-in-the-face".

On the Middle-Ages:
Often people are surprised at my age. They either think I am younger or older, which I guess depends on the circumstances of our meeting, I can and often do act very grown-up, however being a Gemini there is always that ever present duality of self.

In the past two years I have had the fact that I have purposely packed a lot of living into my years on this earth brought home to me. Those of you old enough might recall the old Navy recruitment adds, they went something like “in the Navy we do more before 7am than most people do all day”.

Well, I JQP esq. have done more before the age of 40 (yes, well under 40) than most 12 people do in a lifetime. This in fact is not a bit of idle bragging; it’s more of a lament. I know how Alexander the Great felt when it’s said he sat down a wept because there were no new lands to conquer.

That and the side effects of a life well lived are catching up with me. In the past two years, two knee surgeries, one knee transplant (God Bless Texas) a broken wrist and hand (it happened in a fall, not mine), a broken jaw along with 3 bones in my skull (I didn’t know I had three bones in my skull and yes, my sweet and loving wife was right, I should not of played in my alumni rugby game) a major reoccurrence of malaria (in the tropics always take the blue pills, like they tell you to), also few weeks ago stitches in my nose due to a dog bite. Last but not least add to that an over all cynical disposition.

But it’s the little things that get you, that really bring home the fact that you are not 18 anymore. For instance the day I was trimming my Elvis style mutton chops and noticed that try as I might I could not seem to trim this one hair. That’s when I realized much to my horror that it was growing out of my ear, over night I had become my grandfather, one of those men with hairy ears and I had thought getting gray hairs on my back was bad enough.

Brothers and sisters growing old sucks unless you’re rich, if you’re rich in my experience there are very few things that suck.

Today’s Bill:
Leave her to heaven
And to those thorns that in her bosom lodge,
To prick and sting her.
William Shakespeare, "Hamlet", Act 1 scene 5
Greatest English dramatist & poet (1564 - 1616)

Quote of the Day:
My definition of an expert in any field is a person who knows enough about what's really going on to be scared.
P. J. Plauger, Computer Language, March 1983

I remain much like Crack-Head the rejected Muppet:

JQP esq.