Nazi Doctors, Stakes, Rugby and You:
Thought for the Day:
A flatterer is a friend who is your inferior, or pretends to be so.
Aristotle
(…and a Happy Friday to you as well)
Day Two of the “JQP’s First Annual Viewers Choice Awards
for “Tattoo of the Year”
Send your submissions to indianacityboy@yahoo.com, see the posting on 9/29/05 for rules and details, need not be present to win, void where prohibited by law.
The Day Ahead:
Both my loving wife and I are off to the metropolis of Indianapolis today for an appointment with the “Josef Mengele of Knee Surgeons”, yes dear reader its drain the knee day, I am tired of walking around with one knee the size of a small watermelon.
(Moustache hairs complementary with every meal)
I find the whole process most disturbing, they only give you a local, then they take a fucking huge needle and shove it around inside your knee and lastly it fucking hurts like a little bitch. Thus after that I am going to treat myself to a Blood Mary or two at my favorite steak house in the world, St. Elmo’s (http://www.stelmos.com/history.php). Nothing soothes the savage soul like a steak and a fresh made cocktail.
About 8 years ago I was very, very, sick and had to go through a very demanding medical treatment, to this day I believe that there were only two things that saved me, one being the love of a good woman (props to Mrs. JQP) and second the search for the perfect Bloody Mary.
I love Bloody Mary’s it’s the only drink that is truly an art form for the bartender, have you ever see one’s eye’s light up when you perch on the bar stool and say “I hear you have the best Bloody Mary’s around” then they go into detail about how theirs is both different than all the rest and the best.
Dear reader, I have had Bloody Mary’s from coast to coast, and St. Elmo’s is by far the best. For starters they say when you order them that it will take a little bit. This is because they make it all fresh, per drink. Yes, fresh, they juice tomatoes, grind horseradish etc. for each drinks, no pre-mix here. You can almost feel the heart beat of the veggies when you drink it. Damn brothers and sisters, it’s good… the second best is found at Scotty’s Beach Bar in Surfside Beach, South by-God Carolina, and you can tell ‘em JQP sent you.
Last Night:
The burden of starting a tradition fell heavily upon my shoulders last night; thus this brief re-cap over the events and people who make up the No-Love-Thursday Social Club. I got drunk and loud, big news flash there…Flavia Puff, called the meeting to order, in attendance over the course of the evening, were M. Chamberlain, Newspaper Man, Johnny Vanilla (who proudly told everyone he just bought a Pomeranian for 1000 bills, shit man, I love my wife, but a grand for a fuzz-ball dog). Mark-O the giant Irishman, and sweet and currently non-fertile Mrs. JQP, Double N, and the Biter Red Headed Lady (small attendance, but Pastor Bob and his contingent of malcontents are currently boycotting in protest of Flavia Puffs rein as leader.
After a brief meeting we dashed off to the Macedonian Road House for a meal of melted Velveeta and Pickled farm produce. My bride poured me into bed around 10:00. Shots are like JQP crack… Note to self, no more than 20 shots on a school night, yes, dear reader I am looking and feeling my best today.
Spanking of the Week:
Goes to Little Tommy the bicycle seat sniffer and bugger eater:
Dusty turned me on to his long list of transgressions, better written and typed than I could ever hope to produce for you here: http://slate.msn.com/id/2116392/
This Weekend:
I have my college homecoming, some of you might remember last year when I played in the homecoming alumni vs. the students Rugby game. I lasted 1 minute and 48 seconds before I was knocked unconscious and transported via EMS to a local hospital, due to head trauma. Which I am told, can and often does happen when a 280 pound man stands on your head for any length of time. I happen to think that this presents a fantastic opportunity to try out my new knee, you know lets see what this Texan can do, however my sweet and loving wife said that if I play I am A) fucking nuts and B) taking care of myself during what promises to be a long and painful convalescence.
She however softened her view when I informed her that the double indemnity clause on my life insurance would be in effect. So, if beaten with they dumb-ass stick, I might play a game or two, in a vain effort to recapture a little bit of my misspent youth.
Your Drinks of the Week:
JQP’s “Rich Man’s Sweat” Drink Recipe
Drink Ingredients:
1 tsp. Sweet Vermouth
Orange Juice
1 1/2 oz. Gin
1 Lemon Twist
1 1/2 oz. Anejo Rum
1 oz.. Triple Sec
Fill with Orange Juice
Instruction:
In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine all of the ingredients. Shake well. Strain into a Pint Glass.
The Mexican Stalker Drink Recipe
(Since I have a taste for all things Latin)
Drink Ingredients:
1/2 oz. Lime Juice
1/2 oz. Triple Sec
3 oz. Jose Cuervo Tequila
1/2 oz. Licor 43
1/2 oz. White Rum
Today’s Bill:
A wretched soul, bruised with adversity,
We bid be quiet when we hear it cry;
But were we burdened with like weight of pain,
As much or more we should ourselves complain.
William Shakespeare
Quote of the Day:
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
Sir Winston Churchill
Instruction:
Shake. Strain into chilled martini glass. Garnish with lime wedge.
I remain, much like an uncomfortable itch:
JQP esq.
A flatterer is a friend who is your inferior, or pretends to be so.
Aristotle
(…and a Happy Friday to you as well)
Day Two of the “JQP’s First Annual Viewers Choice Awards
for “Tattoo of the Year”
Send your submissions to indianacityboy@yahoo.com, see the posting on 9/29/05 for rules and details, need not be present to win, void where prohibited by law.
The Day Ahead:
Both my loving wife and I are off to the metropolis of Indianapolis today for an appointment with the “Josef Mengele of Knee Surgeons”, yes dear reader its drain the knee day, I am tired of walking around with one knee the size of a small watermelon.
(Moustache hairs complementary with every meal)
I find the whole process most disturbing, they only give you a local, then they take a fucking huge needle and shove it around inside your knee and lastly it fucking hurts like a little bitch. Thus after that I am going to treat myself to a Blood Mary or two at my favorite steak house in the world, St. Elmo’s (http://www.stelmos.com/history.php). Nothing soothes the savage soul like a steak and a fresh made cocktail.
About 8 years ago I was very, very, sick and had to go through a very demanding medical treatment, to this day I believe that there were only two things that saved me, one being the love of a good woman (props to Mrs. JQP) and second the search for the perfect Bloody Mary.
I love Bloody Mary’s it’s the only drink that is truly an art form for the bartender, have you ever see one’s eye’s light up when you perch on the bar stool and say “I hear you have the best Bloody Mary’s around” then they go into detail about how theirs is both different than all the rest and the best.
Dear reader, I have had Bloody Mary’s from coast to coast, and St. Elmo’s is by far the best. For starters they say when you order them that it will take a little bit. This is because they make it all fresh, per drink. Yes, fresh, they juice tomatoes, grind horseradish etc. for each drinks, no pre-mix here. You can almost feel the heart beat of the veggies when you drink it. Damn brothers and sisters, it’s good… the second best is found at Scotty’s Beach Bar in Surfside Beach, South by-God Carolina, and you can tell ‘em JQP sent you.
Last Night:
The burden of starting a tradition fell heavily upon my shoulders last night; thus this brief re-cap over the events and people who make up the No-Love-Thursday Social Club. I got drunk and loud, big news flash there…Flavia Puff, called the meeting to order, in attendance over the course of the evening, were M. Chamberlain, Newspaper Man, Johnny Vanilla (who proudly told everyone he just bought a Pomeranian for 1000 bills, shit man, I love my wife, but a grand for a fuzz-ball dog). Mark-O the giant Irishman, and sweet and currently non-fertile Mrs. JQP, Double N, and the Biter Red Headed Lady (small attendance, but Pastor Bob and his contingent of malcontents are currently boycotting in protest of Flavia Puffs rein as leader.
After a brief meeting we dashed off to the Macedonian Road House for a meal of melted Velveeta and Pickled farm produce. My bride poured me into bed around 10:00. Shots are like JQP crack… Note to self, no more than 20 shots on a school night, yes, dear reader I am looking and feeling my best today.
Spanking of the Week:
Goes to Little Tommy the bicycle seat sniffer and bugger eater:
Dusty turned me on to his long list of transgressions, better written and typed than I could ever hope to produce for you here: http://slate.msn.com/id/2116392/
This Weekend:
I have my college homecoming, some of you might remember last year when I played in the homecoming alumni vs. the students Rugby game. I lasted 1 minute and 48 seconds before I was knocked unconscious and transported via EMS to a local hospital, due to head trauma. Which I am told, can and often does happen when a 280 pound man stands on your head for any length of time. I happen to think that this presents a fantastic opportunity to try out my new knee, you know lets see what this Texan can do, however my sweet and loving wife said that if I play I am A) fucking nuts and B) taking care of myself during what promises to be a long and painful convalescence.
She however softened her view when I informed her that the double indemnity clause on my life insurance would be in effect. So, if beaten with they dumb-ass stick, I might play a game or two, in a vain effort to recapture a little bit of my misspent youth.
Your Drinks of the Week:
JQP’s “Rich Man’s Sweat” Drink Recipe
Drink Ingredients:
1 tsp. Sweet Vermouth
Orange Juice
1 1/2 oz. Gin
1 Lemon Twist
1 1/2 oz. Anejo Rum
1 oz.. Triple Sec
Fill with Orange Juice
Instruction:
In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine all of the ingredients. Shake well. Strain into a Pint Glass.
The Mexican Stalker Drink Recipe
(Since I have a taste for all things Latin)
Drink Ingredients:
1/2 oz. Lime Juice
1/2 oz. Triple Sec
3 oz. Jose Cuervo Tequila
1/2 oz. Licor 43
1/2 oz. White Rum
Today’s Bill:
A wretched soul, bruised with adversity,
We bid be quiet when we hear it cry;
But were we burdened with like weight of pain,
As much or more we should ourselves complain.
William Shakespeare
Quote of the Day:
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
Sir Winston Churchill
Instruction:
Shake. Strain into chilled martini glass. Garnish with lime wedge.
I remain, much like an uncomfortable itch:
JQP esq.
posted by John Q. Public esq. at 2:20 AM
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