Thursday, July 31, 2008

Last Day as a Trend Setting Consultant:

(I am a man of singular vision and pure bodily fluids)

Last Week Update:
Last weekend my Flower and I drove 4 hours each way to enjoy the long awaited Pierogifest, . We ate more Polish food in three hours than I have ever dreamed could eatten.


To the point I am still sweating like a Pole and Pole sweat my friends smells funny, not like white people (we all know white people smell like wet chickens). I engaged in the Polish traditional folk dances and beer drinking rituals, but after 3 hours and several over flowing Port-a-Potties my Bride bailed on the event and I headed to the Dunes.

Now if you have never been to the Dunes I highly recommend it. We sat on Indiana’s only sandy beach and marveled at the Gary, IN air quality and pharmaceutical waste floating in the water. But, truth be known, I would move up there, just a short train ride into Chicago, and you have beach and woods, all very pretty if you don’t look east or west on the beach…however I bet the winters suck ass. I don’t think we will be making the 8 hour round trip next year, but I feel like I got my ticket punched.

This Weekend Warning Order:
Memphis Tom and his daughter Sweet-Pea (my Goddaughter) will be visiting for 5 wonderful fun filled days. So, I am dismantling our Meth lab and unloading all the unregistered handguns. She is school age now so I am thinking I can teach her how to skin wildlife and make improvised munitions, oh and how to make bread.

On Government Cheese:
Well dear reader, I am busying myself with the never ending search for a lucrative career. I am interviewing across this great land and with a few NGOs over the pond providing services in places the tourists miss.


My personal laptop is currently being repaired by those highly skilled folks at Best Buy; they assure me that it should be back in my hands in four to six weeks. Since today I must send my work laptop back to my previous employer I will have limited access to you clusters of electrons and neutrons on a screen about 14 inches from my face (that is after all how most of you exist to me).

Quote of the Day:
“I have been to the district around Sparta in southern Greece, whose inhabitants were famous for their brevity of speech. When Philip of Macedon threatened them with, "If I enter Laconia, I will raze Sparta to the ground," the Spartans' reply was, "If."

So, until then my friends and enemies who like to keep tabs, all my best: