Watermellon, Lutherans and you:
Though for the Day:
It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
Andre Gide
(My life is a Jan Michael Vincent movie)
Yesterday:
Hey guess what! I got drunk last night, hell I am still drunk! Failed, hell yes! I did and meant to do it. Friends and neighbors, follow me around for a day and you would see why.
Random Thoughts:
I have a rug burn covering half my face.
I blame my wife for everything.
My flower has some nifty Marine moves.
Tattoo John left without saying goodbye.
Lent is to long.
I am going to make cornbread tonight and eat it.
In my job, I have to crawl up the asshole of society.
Last night someone called me an asshole, for the record; I am not.
I am learning about the Pilgrims, they were not nice people.
What counties don’t have an extradition treaty with the US?
I think my wife might be a carrier of bird flu.
I am looking forward to my hangover, around 1pm.
Meatloaf is not good when you’re drunk.
I was informed of the names of the members of the band Asia last night.
I fucking love the song Freebird.
I hung out with M. Chamberlain, Newspaper-man and Tiny, rock-diva.
I even as we speak I am cooking 10 pounds of ribs.
I make my own rub.
Sometimes, I wish I would have become a Priest.
My face hurts.
I am still pretty, in a ruff-trade kind of way.
Fat gay men find me sexy, buy me a beer and I will tell you all about it.
I got beat up in grade school & jr. high.
I masturbate daily.
I also have more sex than anyone man should have, but only for 3 days a month.
I don’t like trying to have a baby.
The last time we tried, still makes me sad, I don’t like to see my flower hurt.
My wife is my best friend.
That doesn’t keep her from getting drunk and hitting me, but this time she said she will change.
I hate basketball.
I pray three times a day.
I want to have a 70’s movie party, complete with cocaine and strippers.
Beef jerky is underrated.
So, is Indiana, however, I truly miss South Carolina.
Tiny knows ever song ever recorded.
M. Chamberlain, is a sharp dresser.
I wish I was in Memphis, for my Goddaughters birthday.
I like Memphis.
I got thrown out of Graceland, 3 times.
Alcohol was a factor in each.
Graceland was the first non-federal entity to effectively use facial recognition software.
I am bared from ever entering Graceland again.
I grew up Amish and truth be known, I miss it often.
I like bread.
Kinky sex, y-e-s…
My wife is on that Atkins diet.
That makes me on the Atkins diet.
People like my wife; they fear me, if they only knew.
I enjoy a good watermelon.
My bride and I are in a process of redefinition.
I love Jesus.
I like the name Angus for a boy.
My wife has big boobs.
I am not a boob man.
We were married 3 years before I noticed she has big boobs.
I am an ass-man.
The South is a different country.
I eat cottage cheese, in the spring and summer with pepper and ripe tomatoes.
Girls don’t flirt with me anymore; I am told my wife scares the shit out of them.
Asparagus makes my pee smell funny.
My wife told me that only happens to 30% of the population.
My face still hurts.
It’s hard to get good turnip greens in the north.
I think most women are bi-sexual.
I am craving hominy.
Union people like me.
I didn’t go parachuting last weekend, however I might this weekend.
I once tried to organize the zoo employees, until last year, I was bared from there too.
The Johnny Cash song, "Boy Named Sue", hits home for me.
If my nut sack matched my dick, I would be hung down to my knees.
However, I can’t complain.
I have not looked at porn since the beginning of Lent.
I think a lot of porn, rests in your definition of art.
Shouting “to deep”, breaks my concentration.
I dream out loud.
I am a lover not a fighter, I keep telling myself that.
I have no tattoos or piercings.
My flower has many.
Nolff, has seen my wife naked.
Never cook bacon while naked.
The question most asked of me, is “how do you do what you do” easy, I drink, that and I am good at it.
I have been told I live an exciting lifestyle; I blame it on Adult ADD.
I read at least two books a week.
I love black olives.
Besides missing the Amish, I miss the Army from time to time.
I have a manly sent about me.
Us and them, is much easer than shades of gray.
My wife was not a virgin when I married her.
Spell-checker wants to correct the previous statements with vermin, which I find mildly amusing.
I don’t like rich people.
I don’t think I ever have to worry about being one.
I am half Gypsy and Irish and it shows.
My flower is Dutch and Scots-Irish, it really shows.
The road is calling.
Joel the barkeep is Jewish.
Passover is right around the corner.
It takes me forever to cum, like at very least an hour.
I cooked acid in college and grew mushrooms in the dressers in my dorm room.
I scared everyone in college but Pastor Bob, Pete the Fireman, and Matt the Cop.
I like a bushy monkey on girls, I want to know it’s a woman I am with.
I don’t like being cold.
I have killed before.
I have pretty green eyes.
I wish I had spring break.
I can pee 16 feet.
I pee three times a day.
My loving flower has eyes of cold steel.
I say "peace", or "out" when I hang up with most people.
I want to go to Memphis and hang with J. Thom, Sweet Pea and my goddaughter.
I make the best ribs in the world, bar-none.
My face really hurts.
I almost married a black woman, however her family didn’t like me.
I also dated a Lutheran once.
I like France.
I read a bit of Shakespeare daily.
I have been to 17 countries.
I was well armed in 12 of them.
I am sobering up.
Beef sticks, horseradish, and extra sharp cheddar, make a good breakfast.
I think catholic is a race.
My dad is dead, I miss him.
Black people think I am black, I have no idea why.
I really miss my grandfather right now.
I drive a pick-up.
I want to move to Africa and call myself a Rhodesian.
I knew a guy who was in the Rhodesian Army.
That makes me think, why don’t we subcontract out our wars.
I also knew a guy who was in the French Foreign Legion.
I know lots of convicted felons.
I am a firm believer in air freshener.
I like to consider myself an un-convicted felon.
I have a large collect of modern art.
I can shoe a horse and butcher a hog.
I can skin a buck and run a trout line.
The only difference between a criminal and a cop is a badge and a gun.
Myrtle Beach was cool, the cast of changed weekly.
I don’t like the north its fucking cold and they don’t have good BBQ.
I have treatment resistant malaria, which means I can’t give blood.
However, I have been known to sell plasma for beer money.
I have connections.
People think sexual abuse is bad, shit; they have never worked a burn case.
I am thinking about finishing the boat and buying an RV.
Tom Raper in Richmond, Indiana sells RVs.
Everything I have is for sale at this point in my life.
I have a work thing tonight from 4 to 6.
I know some really good people.
My close friends know more about honor than most.
In the south people are polite.
Northerners often mistake that for being nice.
I need to get a shower and go to work.
Your fun happy hairy pit pic of the week:
(is that not a cute lil' tuft. a repeat by popular request)
Your Mail Order Brides for the Week:
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=angel82
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=Ujannka
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=happy_and_lucky
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=milayanata
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=Aaricia
(the last one is a keeper)
Today’s Bill:
SONNET 154
The little Love-god lying once asleep
Laid by his side his heart-inflaming brand,
Whilst many nymphs that vow'd chaste life to keep
Came tripping by; but in her maiden hand
The fairest votary took up that fire
I thought I would add a lineor two of bullshit
Since most, if not all of you don’t read this.
Which many legions of true hearts had warm'd;
And so the general of hot desire
Was sleeping by a virgin hand disarm'd.
This brand she quenched in a cool well by,
Which from Love's fire took heat perpetual,
Growing a bath and healthful remedy
For men diseased; but I, my mistress' thrall,
Came there for cure, and this by that I prove,
Love's fire heats water, water cools not love.
Quote of the Day:
Always remember others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself. Dick Nixon
I remain, “Escaping from Witch Mountain”.
JQP
It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
Andre Gide
(My life is a Jan Michael Vincent movie)
Yesterday:
Hey guess what! I got drunk last night, hell I am still drunk! Failed, hell yes! I did and meant to do it. Friends and neighbors, follow me around for a day and you would see why.
Random Thoughts:
I have a rug burn covering half my face.
I blame my wife for everything.
My flower has some nifty Marine moves.
Tattoo John left without saying goodbye.
Lent is to long.
I am going to make cornbread tonight and eat it.
In my job, I have to crawl up the asshole of society.
Last night someone called me an asshole, for the record; I am not.
I am learning about the Pilgrims, they were not nice people.
What counties don’t have an extradition treaty with the US?
I think my wife might be a carrier of bird flu.
I am looking forward to my hangover, around 1pm.
Meatloaf is not good when you’re drunk.
I was informed of the names of the members of the band Asia last night.
I fucking love the song Freebird.
I hung out with M. Chamberlain, Newspaper-man and Tiny, rock-diva.
I even as we speak I am cooking 10 pounds of ribs.
I make my own rub.
Sometimes, I wish I would have become a Priest.
My face hurts.
I am still pretty, in a ruff-trade kind of way.
Fat gay men find me sexy, buy me a beer and I will tell you all about it.
I got beat up in grade school & jr. high.
I masturbate daily.
I also have more sex than anyone man should have, but only for 3 days a month.
I don’t like trying to have a baby.
The last time we tried, still makes me sad, I don’t like to see my flower hurt.
My wife is my best friend.
That doesn’t keep her from getting drunk and hitting me, but this time she said she will change.
I hate basketball.
I pray three times a day.
I want to have a 70’s movie party, complete with cocaine and strippers.
Beef jerky is underrated.
So, is Indiana, however, I truly miss South Carolina.
Tiny knows ever song ever recorded.
M. Chamberlain, is a sharp dresser.
I wish I was in Memphis, for my Goddaughters birthday.
I like Memphis.
I got thrown out of Graceland, 3 times.
Alcohol was a factor in each.
Graceland was the first non-federal entity to effectively use facial recognition software.
I am bared from ever entering Graceland again.
I grew up Amish and truth be known, I miss it often.
I like bread.
Kinky sex, y-e-s…
My wife is on that Atkins diet.
That makes me on the Atkins diet.
People like my wife; they fear me, if they only knew.
I enjoy a good watermelon.
My bride and I are in a process of redefinition.
I love Jesus.
I like the name Angus for a boy.
My wife has big boobs.
I am not a boob man.
We were married 3 years before I noticed she has big boobs.
I am an ass-man.
The South is a different country.
I eat cottage cheese, in the spring and summer with pepper and ripe tomatoes.
Girls don’t flirt with me anymore; I am told my wife scares the shit out of them.
Asparagus makes my pee smell funny.
My wife told me that only happens to 30% of the population.
My face still hurts.
It’s hard to get good turnip greens in the north.
I think most women are bi-sexual.
I am craving hominy.
Union people like me.
I didn’t go parachuting last weekend, however I might this weekend.
I once tried to organize the zoo employees, until last year, I was bared from there too.
The Johnny Cash song, "Boy Named Sue", hits home for me.
If my nut sack matched my dick, I would be hung down to my knees.
However, I can’t complain.
I have not looked at porn since the beginning of Lent.
I think a lot of porn, rests in your definition of art.
Shouting “to deep”, breaks my concentration.
I dream out loud.
I am a lover not a fighter, I keep telling myself that.
I have no tattoos or piercings.
My flower has many.
Nolff, has seen my wife naked.
Never cook bacon while naked.
The question most asked of me, is “how do you do what you do” easy, I drink, that and I am good at it.
I have been told I live an exciting lifestyle; I blame it on Adult ADD.
I read at least two books a week.
I love black olives.
Besides missing the Amish, I miss the Army from time to time.
I have a manly sent about me.
Us and them, is much easer than shades of gray.
My wife was not a virgin when I married her.
Spell-checker wants to correct the previous statements with vermin, which I find mildly amusing.
I don’t like rich people.
I don’t think I ever have to worry about being one.
I am half Gypsy and Irish and it shows.
My flower is Dutch and Scots-Irish, it really shows.
The road is calling.
Joel the barkeep is Jewish.
Passover is right around the corner.
It takes me forever to cum, like at very least an hour.
I cooked acid in college and grew mushrooms in the dressers in my dorm room.
I scared everyone in college but Pastor Bob, Pete the Fireman, and Matt the Cop.
I like a bushy monkey on girls, I want to know it’s a woman I am with.
I don’t like being cold.
I have killed before.
I have pretty green eyes.
I wish I had spring break.
I can pee 16 feet.
I pee three times a day.
My loving flower has eyes of cold steel.
I say "peace", or "out" when I hang up with most people.
I want to go to Memphis and hang with J. Thom, Sweet Pea and my goddaughter.
I make the best ribs in the world, bar-none.
My face really hurts.
I almost married a black woman, however her family didn’t like me.
I also dated a Lutheran once.
I like France.
I read a bit of Shakespeare daily.
I have been to 17 countries.
I was well armed in 12 of them.
I am sobering up.
Beef sticks, horseradish, and extra sharp cheddar, make a good breakfast.
I think catholic is a race.
My dad is dead, I miss him.
Black people think I am black, I have no idea why.
I really miss my grandfather right now.
I drive a pick-up.
I want to move to Africa and call myself a Rhodesian.
I knew a guy who was in the Rhodesian Army.
That makes me think, why don’t we subcontract out our wars.
I also knew a guy who was in the French Foreign Legion.
I know lots of convicted felons.
I am a firm believer in air freshener.
I like to consider myself an un-convicted felon.
I have a large collect of modern art.
I can shoe a horse and butcher a hog.
I can skin a buck and run a trout line.
The only difference between a criminal and a cop is a badge and a gun.
Myrtle Beach was cool, the cast of changed weekly.
I don’t like the north its fucking cold and they don’t have good BBQ.
I have treatment resistant malaria, which means I can’t give blood.
However, I have been known to sell plasma for beer money.
I have connections.
People think sexual abuse is bad, shit; they have never worked a burn case.
I am thinking about finishing the boat and buying an RV.
Tom Raper in Richmond, Indiana sells RVs.
Everything I have is for sale at this point in my life.
I have a work thing tonight from 4 to 6.
I know some really good people.
My close friends know more about honor than most.
In the south people are polite.
Northerners often mistake that for being nice.
I need to get a shower and go to work.
Your fun happy hairy pit pic of the week:
(is that not a cute lil' tuft. a repeat by popular request)
Your Mail Order Brides for the Week:
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=angel82
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=Ujannka
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=happy_and_lucky
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=milayanata
http://www.eastwestmatch.com/search.cfm?from=email&nick=Aaricia
(the last one is a keeper)
Today’s Bill:
SONNET 154
The little Love-god lying once asleep
Laid by his side his heart-inflaming brand,
Whilst many nymphs that vow'd chaste life to keep
Came tripping by; but in her maiden hand
The fairest votary took up that fire
I thought I would add a lineor two of bullshit
Since most, if not all of you don’t read this.
Which many legions of true hearts had warm'd;
And so the general of hot desire
Was sleeping by a virgin hand disarm'd.
This brand she quenched in a cool well by,
Which from Love's fire took heat perpetual,
Growing a bath and healthful remedy
For men diseased; but I, my mistress' thrall,
Came there for cure, and this by that I prove,
Love's fire heats water, water cools not love.
Quote of the Day:
Always remember others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself. Dick Nixon
I remain, “Escaping from Witch Mountain”.
JQP
posted by John Q. Public esq. at 2:20 AM
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