Free Snuff, Bad Tattoos & Good Football
Thought for the Day:
Hell is full of musical amateurs: music is the brandy of the damned.
George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman (1903) act 3
Points of Order for a Monday Morning:
Ok folks, I have a big deal meeting this morning out of town so I am getting ready to hit the road. It’s a long day ahead, I have a training I am doing tonight till around 7:30, “Shitzville”, not the way to start a Monday. Good thing I am steadfast a loyal, bad thing I cant find anyone to do this crap for me.
Michana and In-Breeding:
As you the reader know, I was forced at gun point to go to a Country Music Festival in the city of South Bend on Sunday. The folks this event pulled out of the wood work. There were about 40,000 people there.
If ever there was a time to break into a house trailer in the tri-state area, it was that day. Sadly most of the concert goers looked like their dental insurance was modeled after the extensive services provided by the oral health giant, Great Britain.
Not counting me and my bride there were perhaps 12 full sets of teeth. Hell they were giving away free snuff and chewing tobacco, there is just something sexy about being able to bum a dip off your 14 year old girlfriend.
Friends you have not lived until you have watched a 63 year old woman in a mid-drift tee-shit (Harley-Davidson, of course) wearing Daisy Dukes, getting down and doing some red-neck’en. Save a Horse ride a Cowboy my ass. The only thing more prevalent than bad teeth was bad tattoos. If you are going to scar yourself in some ritualistic manner, then at least have someone who knows what there doing do it for you. I have seen better tat’s on pre-teens in juvenile detention facilities
On why I don’t like Country Music:
It sucks. . . .
When I was a young man, my parents listened to country music, hell I remember having to listen to the Grand Old Opry, let alone watch the countless episodes of Hee Haw. Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, shit even Johnny Paycheck those folks to me are country music.
What I was exposed to Sunday, wasn’t country music it was country pop. Think of “The Back Street Boys” but growing up in Nashville with mullets. As one old boy told me, if it isn’t country it aint’ shit, well dear reader to my refined tastes, it aint’ shit.
(However, I would do Gretchen Wilson in a red hot minute, but then again, I come from a long line of white trash and there is just something special about those trailer park girls.)
On Sports:
The weekend was a busy one, one full of good football (as if you needed proof that God is Catholic). So, good in fact the neighbors called the cops on me at the end of the Notre Dame game, it seems they mistook my screams of joy for a murder in progress. However it worked out ok, they(the cops) stayed and watched the last ten mins. of the game with me, after which we turned the channel and watched St. Francis beat the crap out of Indiana State. Add to that that the local Catholic High Schools were all un-beaten on Friday and you have definitive proof that the big man up stairs is not only a football fan, but also a Papist.
A shout out to CPF, sorry his weekend of victory was not complete. However I would like to give him a golf clap, because he had invited both myself and my loving bride to his home in the quaint river town of South Bend, going as far as to offer complementary beverages made from fermented hops. After such a trying Sunday, spent covered in sweat and with the twang of country music still ringing in our ears, both my bride and I thought the trip home a better decision, that and she had PMS & is rabid Detroit fan.
Your Bill for the Day:
So may he rest, his faults lie gently on him!
William Shakespeare
Quote of the Day:
Nobody in the game of football should be called a genius. A genius is somebody like Norman Einstein. Joe Theismann
I remain, the house guest who will look in your medicine cabinet:
JQP esq.
Hell is full of musical amateurs: music is the brandy of the damned.
George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman (1903) act 3
Points of Order for a Monday Morning:
Ok folks, I have a big deal meeting this morning out of town so I am getting ready to hit the road. It’s a long day ahead, I have a training I am doing tonight till around 7:30, “Shitzville”, not the way to start a Monday. Good thing I am steadfast a loyal, bad thing I cant find anyone to do this crap for me.
Michana and In-Breeding:
As you the reader know, I was forced at gun point to go to a Country Music Festival in the city of South Bend on Sunday. The folks this event pulled out of the wood work. There were about 40,000 people there.
If ever there was a time to break into a house trailer in the tri-state area, it was that day. Sadly most of the concert goers looked like their dental insurance was modeled after the extensive services provided by the oral health giant, Great Britain.
Not counting me and my bride there were perhaps 12 full sets of teeth. Hell they were giving away free snuff and chewing tobacco, there is just something sexy about being able to bum a dip off your 14 year old girlfriend.
Friends you have not lived until you have watched a 63 year old woman in a mid-drift tee-shit (Harley-Davidson, of course) wearing Daisy Dukes, getting down and doing some red-neck’en. Save a Horse ride a Cowboy my ass. The only thing more prevalent than bad teeth was bad tattoos. If you are going to scar yourself in some ritualistic manner, then at least have someone who knows what there doing do it for you. I have seen better tat’s on pre-teens in juvenile detention facilities
On why I don’t like Country Music:
It sucks. . . .
When I was a young man, my parents listened to country music, hell I remember having to listen to the Grand Old Opry, let alone watch the countless episodes of Hee Haw. Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, shit even Johnny Paycheck those folks to me are country music.
What I was exposed to Sunday, wasn’t country music it was country pop. Think of “The Back Street Boys” but growing up in Nashville with mullets. As one old boy told me, if it isn’t country it aint’ shit, well dear reader to my refined tastes, it aint’ shit.
(However, I would do Gretchen Wilson in a red hot minute, but then again, I come from a long line of white trash and there is just something special about those trailer park girls.)
On Sports:
The weekend was a busy one, one full of good football (as if you needed proof that God is Catholic). So, good in fact the neighbors called the cops on me at the end of the Notre Dame game, it seems they mistook my screams of joy for a murder in progress. However it worked out ok, they(the cops) stayed and watched the last ten mins. of the game with me, after which we turned the channel and watched St. Francis beat the crap out of Indiana State. Add to that that the local Catholic High Schools were all un-beaten on Friday and you have definitive proof that the big man up stairs is not only a football fan, but also a Papist.
A shout out to CPF, sorry his weekend of victory was not complete. However I would like to give him a golf clap, because he had invited both myself and my loving bride to his home in the quaint river town of South Bend, going as far as to offer complementary beverages made from fermented hops. After such a trying Sunday, spent covered in sweat and with the twang of country music still ringing in our ears, both my bride and I thought the trip home a better decision, that and she had PMS & is rabid Detroit fan.
Your Bill for the Day:
So may he rest, his faults lie gently on him!
William Shakespeare
Quote of the Day:
Nobody in the game of football should be called a genius. A genius is somebody like Norman Einstein. Joe Theismann
I remain, the house guest who will look in your medicine cabinet:
JQP esq.
posted by John Q. Public esq. at 2:20 AM
<< Home