...a 101 Fun things to do with Lard!
Thought for the Day:
Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.
Confucius, Chinese philosopher & reformer (551 BC - 479 BC)
Dear Bonnie Price Charley and his Pretty New Wife:
I, John Q. Public would like to take a moment to wish Prince Charles and his new wife Camilla Parker Bows Windsor all the best. Both the Sweet and Ever so Petite Mrs. JQP and I are sorry we could not be there to share your special day, but since my parole officer wouldnt let me leave the state we had to stay home. However you should know we were with you both on "your" day in sprit. Please look for a gift card to Lowes in the amount of 20.00 US Dollars in the post soon. Once again all our best!
(A close up of the Blushing Brides smile. Says a lot about the dentistry sciences in Merry ol’ England, eh what?)
Naked Pictures of JQP:
You know I feel violated. Yes, it finally happened to me. I had an ex-girlfriend post pictures of our erotic love making on the net for the whole world to see. I feel so cheap. Sadly, I had to find out about in from my old Boy Scout leader who recognized me.
I called my old girl friend and asked her what the hell she thought so was doing and to take them down and to never post anything like that again, I am after all a public man. She said “no-way…the pics are just too hot and its generating way to much revenue for her Adult-Pay-Per-View site. She then went on to say that you can’t even tell it’s me.
Well, dear reader, this morning I came here to the public library to use their computer to look at this site and the pictures in question. My God! I am so embarrassed. Anyone who knows me can plainly see that that is me in the pic.
Who else do you know that has one foot that’s size 11 ½ and another that’s size 12. Damn her.
Today’s Bill:
"To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow; a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing."
--From Macbeth (V, v, 19)
Quote of the Day:
At 20 years of age the will reigns,
at 30 the wit,
at 40 the judgment.
Benjamin Franklin,
US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, & printer (1706 - 1790)
I remain,
JQP
Poet Warrior
Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.
Confucius, Chinese philosopher & reformer (551 BC - 479 BC)
Dear Bonnie Price Charley and his Pretty New Wife:
I, John Q. Public would like to take a moment to wish Prince Charles and his new wife Camilla Parker Bows Windsor all the best. Both the Sweet and Ever so Petite Mrs. JQP and I are sorry we could not be there to share your special day, but since my parole officer wouldnt let me leave the state we had to stay home. However you should know we were with you both on "your" day in sprit. Please look for a gift card to Lowes in the amount of 20.00 US Dollars in the post soon. Once again all our best!
(A close up of the Blushing Brides smile. Says a lot about the dentistry sciences in Merry ol’ England, eh what?)
Naked Pictures of JQP:
You know I feel violated. Yes, it finally happened to me. I had an ex-girlfriend post pictures of our erotic love making on the net for the whole world to see. I feel so cheap. Sadly, I had to find out about in from my old Boy Scout leader who recognized me.
I called my old girl friend and asked her what the hell she thought so was doing and to take them down and to never post anything like that again, I am after all a public man. She said “no-way…the pics are just too hot and its generating way to much revenue for her Adult-Pay-Per-View site. She then went on to say that you can’t even tell it’s me.
Well, dear reader, this morning I came here to the public library to use their computer to look at this site and the pictures in question. My God! I am so embarrassed. Anyone who knows me can plainly see that that is me in the pic.
Who else do you know that has one foot that’s size 11 ½ and another that’s size 12. Damn her.
Today’s Bill:
"To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow; a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing."
--From Macbeth (V, v, 19)
Quote of the Day:
At 20 years of age the will reigns,
at 30 the wit,
at 40 the judgment.
Benjamin Franklin,
US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, & printer (1706 - 1790)
I remain,
JQP
Poet Warrior
posted by John Q. Public esq. at 2:20 PM
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